Creating the Perfect World
by KJ99
Summary: Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi what so ever. Adam and Clare have been dating for nine months, happily I might add. Now Darcy, Clare's older sister returns home how will that affected the dynamic? Let's find out together,
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hi everyone welcome to this new story, I have been working on it for a while and have decided now is the perfect time to publish it. I don't really have a direction for this story, there's a little bit but not much so if there's anything you would like to happen just let me know and we'll see what happens. Thank-you and enjoy! ~KJ99

* * *

Creating the Perfect World

* * *

I was standing outside of the school having a smoke waiting for my girlfriend Clare to finish up with her student council, I was her ride home today and I also needed some help with my school work. Clare and I had been dating for about 9 months now; we had been going strong and were getting stronger by the day. This was the real deal for both of us, we are already talking about the future and what we are planning on doing, what colleges we are thinking of going to and just our future together. A few arguments have happened but we have been able to work through them and come out stronger on the other side.

Clare and I are really strong together, she was really kind and understanding about stuff she didn't even know about. I still had a lot of issues to deal with, I still need to get the rest of my surgery down but we are working through it together; Clare has even come with me to my counselling sessions. Eli my ex-friend and Clare's ex-boyfriend broke up during Eli's senior year they had this huge fight about the future and mutually decided that even though they had been through a lot they just couldn't last the distance; they broke up.

Clare was really upset; I was there for her through the many months of eating ice-cream, through the nights of holding her until she fell asleep. After that she started to smile more, I was hanging out with her more than Eli so we kind weren't friends anymore but Clare and I were. As Clare and I started to hang out more, my feelings for her start to grow I knew they were there but I just didn't want to mess Clare and Eli up but with him not in the picture anymore. One day I told Clare how I felt about her, she was shocked but said she would be lying if she said she didn't feel the same way for me. We started to date and didn't care what anyone thought or said, Drew was on my case about how bros aren't meant to do that to each other and I just told him it had nothing to do with.

I didn't really have the best relationship with Drew but I didn't care, he was already our parent's favourite and I hate it. My Mum would always be on my case about smoking but it was a habit I picked up from the time I wasn't happy with being a female, it would also take the stress of rejection from my Mum about wanting to become who I actually am. Looking up at the school doors I saw Clare, Alli, Jenna, Connor, Dallas and Drew all coming out of the school, they were all on school council, Clare had tried to get me to join but it wasn't my thing. Walking over to them, Clare smiles over at me and I smile back at her.

I asked "Good meeting?"

Clare replied with "Yeah, we've organised a day where we'll be teaching everyone about safe driving and not to text while driving."

I say "That sounds great; I told you it was a good idea."

Clare replied with "Yeah I know," Clare leant up to peck my lips.

Jenna said "A'ww you two are adorable."

Clare replied with "I know," she wrapped her arms around me and I kept smoking my smoke. Clare had tried to get me to quit but once I explained to her that if I don't smoke, I'm going to get angry and mad all the time so it's better if I keep smoking. She didn't like it but she soon got passed it and she actually likes the smell of the smoke on me; which is pretty cool but she hates the taste. Clare smoked a bit of one and almost threw up from the taste but the smell grew on her.

Drew asked "Adam, are you coming home tonight?"

I replied with "No, I'll be at Clare's again." We hadn't slept together at all, I just wasn't ready and I didn't have the right equipment yet. When Clare's Mum found out how uncomfortable I felt at my own house around my own Mum, Drew, even Dallas sometimes; she immediately told me I could stay over anytime but in the spare room. I was really grateful for Clare's family and I think Clare was too because when stuff happened with my family I would yell at Clare; which scared her and we both felt extremely bad mainly me though. I can't really remember the last time I was home for more than just extra clothes, like all my stuff is literally at Clare's and my Mum didn't even care or Drew. Drew just rolled his eyes at me and left with Dallas to go home, I stay standing with Clare and our friends.

Clare asked "You okay?"

I replied with "Absolutely great," I stepped back from her and started to focus on my smoke and calm down.

Clare said "Adam."

I replied with "Really, I'm fine Clare. I'm going to go bring the car around."

Clare said "Alright," we looked at each other before I left with my smoke to get the car.

* * *

Clare's P.O.V

Watching as Adam walked away, you didn't need to be a counsellor to know something was wrong with Adam, he was upset and mad. I thought I knew what was wrong; the fact Drew, his Mum and Drew's Dad barely cared about him. I couldn't remember the last time Adam wasn't at my house, which was fine by me but how could his family not care about him.

Alli then asked "Is he okay?"

I replied with "Nope."

Connor asked "What happened for him not to be okay?"

I answered with "Adam particularly lives at my house now."

Jenna asked "And what's wrong with that?" she smiled at me and I smiled back.

I replied with "Absolutely nothing but his family doesn't even care that his not there, he only goes back for clothes now and most of them are already at my house, and getting mixed up with Jake's clothes."

Alli said "So that's why Jake was wearing one of Adam's shirts the other day, I thought something was up."

I replied with "Yeah, Adam didn't have the heart to tell him and I let him wear it all day before telling him it was Adam's shirt not his."

Jenna asked "How did he react?"

I answered with "His face was full of shock but then he just shrugged his shoulders and told me my boyfriend had a good taste in clothing," we all laughed at Jake being Jake. Jake and I used to date but when our parents started to date, then they moved in and then our parents got married it just became too weird for us and we broke up. He was now like a brother to me and we were really close, like he wasn't a stepbrother he is a brother.

"Clare!" I heard Adam shout and a horn beep.

I shout back "I'll be there in a minute," he nods his head and waits.

I said "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Jenna replied with "That you will," we smiled at each other before I hugged each of them before leaving to get into Adam's car.

Half of the drive home was spent in silence but then Adam asked "How was your day?" he must no longer be mad at Drew anymore.

"Yeah it was good, how was yours?"

"It was alright," Adam smiled over at me and I smiled back.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Clare. I just wished they'd care some more."

"I know Adam, it sucks how they treat you," Adam nodded his head and the rest of the drive was spent in silence. I didn't mind the silence at all, it gave me time to think and enjoy the moments I share with Adam. He pulled the car into my driveway; he hopped out first and run around to open my door for me as well as helping me out of the car. Adam then carried both of our school bags inside for us, I opened the door for us and when we walked into the lounge room; I saw someone I hadn't seen in ages.

I shout "Oh my god! Darcy!" I run straight over to her and hug her.

"Hey sis," was her reply as she hugs me back.

Stepping back, I ask "What are you doing here?"

"Well I decided it was time to come home to see my little sister and to meet my new stepdad and stepbrother," I nodded my head and wrapped her into a big hug again. Hearing something drop on the ground caused me to turn to see Adam had place the bags down on the floor, he smiled at me and I smiled back at him.

Darcy then asked "And who this?"

Before I can say anything Jake said "What a shock Adam's here again."

I roll my eyes and say "Shut up Jake," we go into a brother and sister fight which end ups with me in a head lock

I shout "Adam! Adam help!"

Adam replied with "Nah you look like you can break out of that," Mum, Glen and Darcy all laugh at that.

I shout "When I get out of this I'm going to kill you."

Adam replied with "Oh I'm terrified."

Jake's phone started to ring both Adam and I say "Jakie's Girlfriend, Jakie's girlfriend!"

Jake glares at us and say "Shut up," he realises me to answer his phone and I run straight at Adam. Adam just wraps his arms around me and holds me close to him while staring deeply into my eyes, which he knows makes me crazy.

Darcy then said "Okay, I take it by that look Clare has a boyfriend that I didn't know about."

Adam gasped and said "You didn't tell her about me."

I replied with "She always talking about herself and I can't get a word in."

Adam nods and said "Now I see how your sisters," I gasped and slap him on the shoulder. He then gives me his puppy eyed look which I can't resist; I roll my eyes before leaning into peck his lips.

I then turn and say "Darcy this is my boyfriend Adam, Adam this is my sister Darcy," Adam puts his hand out and Darcy shakes it.

Darcy said "It's nice to meet you; I can't wait to get to know you."

Adam nods and said "Likewise," they then stop shaking hands and Adam wraps his arms around my waist.

Adam then asked "Mrs Martin it's still alright for me to be here right?"

Mum replied with "Yes of course it is Adam but you're going to have to sleep on the couch, since the room you were using is Darcy's."

Adam nods and say "That's totally fine, I don't mind," they smile at each other and I smile back at Adam.

Darcy then asked "Since when are boyfriends allowed to sleepover?"

Mum answered with "Since I say so," Darcy nods but looks over at us.

I hear Adam sigh and say "I'm FTM okay, my family aren't as cool with it as they like me to believe and I just feel uncomfortable there and around them, so Clare's family allows me to stay here whenever I like and it's okay with them as long as I respect their rules."

Darcy slowly nods her head and said "You can barely tell."

Mum and I both shout "Darcy!"

Darcy replied with "What? You can't and it's a compliment. I'm sorry that me coming back means you have to sleep on the couch."

Adam said "Thanks, it's nothing really, I don't really care what I sleep on," Darcy nods and smiles at me; which tells me she like him.

Jake walks back into the room with a big smile on his face; he asked "Adam do you want play some video games?"

Adam answered with "Yeah sure, I'll just have a quick smoke."

Jake replied with "Alright, it'll give me a chance to set up."

Adam nods while Darcy asked "You smoke?"

Adam replied with "Yeah," I see Darcy give me a look of why haven't you stopped him and I just give her the look back of I'll explain later. Adam starts to leave the room before coming back into the room, he spins me around and fall out kisses me in front of my family; he then breaks us apart and walks away with a huge smile on his face while I stand there breathless.

* * *

Adam's P.O.V

I was standing outside on Clare's front porch having my smoke when the door opened, looking behind me I saw Darcy walk out she immediately wrapped her arms around herself clearly cold.

"How can you stand being out here it's freezing?"

"The smoke it keeps me warm."

"Right, why do you smoke Adam?"

"It's habit I picked up as a kid."

"How do you pick up smoking as a kid?"

"I just did, let's leave it at that."

"Okay, I just want to make sure your right for my sister."

"I don't know if I am but I'm going make sure Clare is happy, always smiling and I would never hurt her. I'd rather die than hurt Clare, no I'd rather stay as female than hurt Clare."

"Wow that's huge."

"You have no idea. I don't know what will happen with Clare and I but I'm going to do my best to make her happy and always be there for her no matter what."

"Well that's just what any big sister wants to hear," I smiled at her before crashing my smoke out on the ash tray Glen had bought me for when I was here.

Leaning against a pole I asked "So are you really back for good?"

"Yeah, I've seen all I need to see in the world and now it's time to come home."

"Right, if you don't mind me asking why did you leave?"

"No, it's okay. Umm…when I was on spring break with my friends I was drugged and then raped, it took me a while to remember it but I start to feel really bad all the time. I didn't understand why until I remembered everything that happened, I then started too acted out so badly I almost got Mr Simpson fired but I ended up telling him what happened. My parents then decided that I should go to Kenya to do some charity work, it didn't magically disappear all my anger and frustration of being used like that but now I've worked through it all."

"Wow, I'm sorry that happened to you but I'm really happy that you've been able to work through all your issues."

"Thanks Adam, we should probably get back in there."

"Yeah, thank-you for trusting me enough to tell me that."

"You're welcome and maybe one day you'll trust me enough to tell me all your horror stories but you should trust Clare."

"What makes you think I've got any?"

"I see it in your eyes," I looked at her strangely before following her inside.

Walking into the lounge room, Jake said "About time."

"Sorry, I just need another minute."

Jake replied with "Okay."

Looking at Darcy she said "Upstairs," I smile at her and start walking over to the stairs to go up them.

Walking down the hallway to Clare's room, I lightly knock on the door and hear "Come in," slowly walking in I find Clare doing homework.

"Hey, I didn't mean to interrupt you."

"It's fine Adam, come here," I enter the room and close the door behind me. I walk into Clare's room more and sit down on her bed, carefully avoiding sitting on any of her homework.

"Are you okay?"

"Not really."

"What's wrong?"

"My past, I haven't been entirely honest with you about it."

"What are you talking about?"

"There are things I haven't told anyone, no one outside of my family knows about it. Things I can't comprehend that actually happened, things that no person should ever have to go through."

"Why are you telling me this Adam?"

"You deserve the truth and to know why I am so messed up."

"Why are you telling me now? And you're not a mess."

"Your sister came outside while I was smoking and she told me why she left, about what happened to her and I am so sorry that happened to your sister."

"It was really scary when it happened, she was going through all this pain and I had no idea what was really going on."

"Yeah, I understand what you mean and if you want to talk about it just talk and I'll listen."

"Thank-you Adam, I never could with Eli or Alli and Jenna they just didn't know or understand."

"I do."

"You keep saying that like, like you've almost been there."

"That's because I have."

"What?"

Looking up at Clare I say "No one can ever know about what I'm going to tell you."

"Of course Adam, you can trust me."

"It started out when I was really young like 3 or 4 maybe, my Dad he would come into my room to say goodnight to me but it was more than tucking me into bed. More like he would get into the bed with me, he would touch me in ways no father should and he hurt me in more ways than I could possible know at the time. This went on for months no one knew what he was really doing, when I would start fighting back he would hold me down really tight until I stopped moving, stopped fighting at all."

"Adam," I looked up at Clare to see she had tears rolling down her cheek. Picking up her books, I placed them over on her desk and sat down on her bed next to her. I wrapped my arms around her and she held onto me tight as I started living my memories.

"This went on until I was six then he stopped, I think he got bored with me or something. That's when I started to stop wearing dresses and started to wear boys clothes, every time I refused to wear a dress he'd hit me and it would get harder and harder. Bruises came, broken bones came and a concussion once as well. He broke two bones in my right leg and my left shoulder bone was shredded. Mum knew all this was going on and never stopped it once, she never stopped him from hurting me and a part of me started to believe this was all my fault. That all happened when I was six to about eight. When I was eight I would stop wearing dress completely, like I had burnt them all up and because I did that he decided to burn my feet. He would get cigarettes, light them up and burn them on my feet, I would scream for hours and maybe even days on end because of the pain," pausing to rip off my shoes and socks to show Clare what he did.

"With the burning of my feet happening the sexual assault picked up again, he would force himself on me every single night and when he left my room I'd cry myself to sleep, some nights I didn't get sleep. When I was ten my Mum finally took me away from him, we left California and moved to Florida, I was so grateful to finally be away from that man, the man of my nightmares. In Florida I told my Mum that I was supposed to be a boy but she just told me no that wasn't allowed in her house, that was end of discussion for her. I went to middle school there and I thought everything was okay until one of my female teachers kept asking me to stay behind after school, there she would start to sexual assault me in ways I didn't know were possible. I would keep telling her no but she wouldn't listen, it got to the point were crying, screaming and yelling was no use and I just took it; again believing it was my fault. By the time my Mum had meet Drew's Dad all the damage had been done, I started to smoke in Florida when I was eleven because I need something to take the pain away, to take the angry and to stop feeling. When Drew's Dad found out about the teacher assaulting me he moved as all here to Toronto, Canada, he got me the help I needed and he help get my Mum to understand that this wasn't a choice for me; I was just being who I am. I didn't chose to be born a female, if I had it my way I would've been born Male and there wouldn't be any issues but now there is. I do blame my Mum for what happened I mean who wouldn't, she could have stopped it but she never did and Drew, he just doesn't understand. He doesn't understand why I need a night light on to fall asleep, he doesn't understand why I wake up screaming which wakes everyone up, he doesn't understand what I went through and still going through." Looking down at Clare in my shoulder I saw the pain she was feeling, I saw the sadness in her eyes and I felt the tears soaking up into my shirt.

Clare then said through and around tears "I am so sorry that you went through all that. You didn't deserve that no one deserve to be assault like that, to have their childhood memories to be those and to not have a childhood filled of laughter and happiness."

"It's not fair, I know that Clare."

"It's not right either Adam, I hate your Mum for letting that happen to you."

"Yeah me too."

"Thank-you for trusting me enough to tell me that, I'm glad I know."

"You're welcome Clare, now you know why I'm such a mess."

"You are not a mess."

"I am, I have all this issues and baggies."

"Which we can get through together."

"Together, I like the sound of that."

"Me too Adam," we both smile at each other before both leaning into share a small kiss.

Clare then said "I want you to know if you ever want to talk to me, to just talk. I want us to both be able to talk to each other, openly and freely, not having to worry what the other will think."

"Yeah I would like that very much."

"Good."

"Can I tell you some more things?"

"Of course Adam," I give her a little smile before thinking about how to get this across.

"I get scared sometimes that you might want to take our relationship to the next level, meaning sex. I just want you to know that I'm not ready for that, I want to get all my surgery done before I do anything like that, don't get me wrong I love you and think you are incredible sexy, hot even; I just need to feel like me." I watched as Clare took in what I had said and thinking over her answer before saying a word.

"Again thank-you for being honest with me, it really helps for me to know where your head is because sometimes it's really hard to tell where you are at. But I'm not ready either, I've always wanted to wait until I'm married before having sex, I know it's old fashion and not the trend these day but they are just my beliefs. I think your hot to Adam and I think it's important for us to both feel comfortable with ourselves and then with each other before we go to that level."

"Cool, do you think if we talk to your Mum and Glen about this, they'd let me sleep in here?"

"Keep dreaming Adam."

"Oh I will," Clare shook her head at me and leant forward to kiss me. The kiss was becoming really heated, I had moved so I was lying on top of Clare and she was lying underneath me. Clare's had tangled her fingers in my hair, as she brought me further into the kiss.

We were then interrupted by a knock at the door and Jake's voice saying "Dude stop kissing my sister and come play video games with me," dropping my head down into the crook of Clare's neck annoyed.

Clare yelled out through a laugh "Go away Jake!" I started to laugh into Clare's neck and her laughing didn't help calm my laughing down.

"Hey stop laughing at me!" that didn't help either.

Sighing I roll off from lying on top of Clare and say "I should let you get back to your homework."

"Who can do homework after that?"

"Sorry."

"No it's okay," Clare pecked my cheek.

Jake pounded on the door and shouted "Come on."

I shout back "I'll be a down in a minute."

"You better or, or I'm telling my Dad," we hear him storm off but just laugh at him.

"Do you want to come watch?"

"Yeah okay."

"Awesome," we both stand up, I pick Clare up and place her over my shoulder.

Clare said through giggling "Adam, put me down."

"No," making sure I have her before starting to walk over to the door. Opening the door very carefully, I walk through it and Clare is able to shut it behind us.

"Now can you put me down."

"Nope," walking down the stairs was a bit tricky but we eventually got down. Walking into the lounge room we find Darcy and Jake in there, they both turn and laugh.

Clare said "This is no laughing matter."

Jake replied with "Oh yes it is," they both then start to take photos.

"I'm going to kill you both, once I get down," we all laugh before I dropped her down carefully onto the lounge.

I asked "Do you need a drink?"

Clare replied with "Yeah, water."

I say "I'll be back."

Jake said "Oh come on," I give him a look and he gives me one back.

Darcy then said "I'll go get them, water for you too Adam?"

"Please," she smiles at me and leaves the room. Sitting down on the couch in between Clare and Jake, Clare automatically pulls me to half lay on her while Jake hands me a controller.

I asked "What are we playing?"

Jake answered with "NBA 2k15."

"Awesome," after setting the game up and kiss of good luck from Clare and I was already to go to beat Jake ass; he has never beaten me in this game.

* * *

When we were called to dinner from Clare's Mum, Jake wasn't talking to me at all we had played five games and I had won all five; he now won't speak to me and keeps glaring at me. Pulling out Clare's chair for her before pushing it in and going into the kitchen to help carry the food in, Mrs Martins has cooked burgers for dinner tonight. Carrying in the rolls for the burgers, I placed them in the middle of the table before taking my seat next to Clare. Jake was sitting across from me and he was glaring at me, Darcy sat in front of Clare which left the heads of the table for the parents. As Glenn walked around the table pouring everyone a Pepsi to drink, he hit Jake on the back of the head which made me smile a little.

Glen then said "It's rude to glare at the dinner table."

Jake replied with "But he beat me five times in a row, how is that even possible."

I say "Because you suck," Clare and Darcy nod their heads. Mrs Martins brought in the paddies and placed them down next to the rolls, we had salad and sauce to put into our burgers.

Glen said "Just like to say I am grateful for you all being in my life and Darcy it's great to have you home and to finally meet you," we all smiled at each other happily; this is where I belonged.

Mrs Martin said "Now all please dig in." I grab two rolls; place one on my plate and another on Clare's plate while doing that Clare places a paddy on both of our plates. We choose what salad we have and how much we want before the other adds more because we need more salad each, I then put tomato sauce onto Clare's burger while she places BBQ sauce onto my burger.

Looking up I see Darcy staring at us in shock, Clare asked "What?"

Darcy replied with "I've never seen a couple do that before," I just shrug, peck Clare on the cheek and dig into my burger.

As we all continue eating, Darcy said "I have some news."

Mrs Martins asked "What's that?"

Darcy replied with "I've got a meeting with Mr Simpson in the morning and if everything goes to plan, I'll be attending Degrassi High School once again."

Clare said through a mouthful "What?"

Mrs Martins said "Clare manners," both Jake and I crack up laughing but when I get slapped by Clare I stop and Jake now laughs at me.

Mrs Martin ignores us and asked "You're going back to school?"

Darcy replied with "Yeah, I've had the experience and now I need the knowledge plus it's hard getting a job without graduating from high school."

Mrs Martins said "That's great, would you like me come with you?" Looking over at Clare I could see she wasn't handling the news real well which I didn't understand.

Darcy replied with "No, I'll be fine."

Clare then said "Great, I'll be little Edwards again, the freaky sister," Clare stands up and runs off, we soon hear a door slam shut.

I sit there awkwardly for a few minutes trying to think what to say and I end up saying "I better go after her," Mrs Martins and Darcy both nod at me.

Standing up from the table about to leave, Glen said "Adam?"

Turning around I say "Yeah."

Glenn replied with "Take your plates up with you."

Nodding I say "Right," walking back over to the table. I put extra food onto our plates and once I have enough I leave again to go see what's wrong with Clare.

I hear Jake shout out "Good luck," I smile before continuing up the stairs.

When I reach Clare's door I realise I can't open it, I say "Knock, knock."

I hear Clare say back "Who's there?"

I replied with "Awesome boyfriend."

Clare asked "Awesome boyfriend who?"

I answer with "Awesome boyfriend who bring you food," I hear Clare giggle before the door opens and I see Clare massive smile.

"Hey beautiful," Clare smiles at me, pulls me into the room before closing the door. I stay standing next to the door with the plates of food while Clare walks over to sit down on her bed, I then place the plates of food down on her bedside table and sit down on the bed in front of her.

"Can you explain it to me?" I asked.

"When I started at Degrassi, I was part of this smart people program along with Alli and Connor; Jenna came along in the second semester. Anyway that's why I was there and I was known as little Edwards or the freaky sister because everyone knew I was smarter than Darcy, now I'll go back to that. I just don't want to go back to that when so much has happened."

"You won't."

"How do you know?"

"Well the only people who know that happened was you, Connor, Alli and Jenna, all the people who would've known have graduated or don't care."

"Guess when you say it like that."

"You're not a freak just because your super smart doesn't make you a freak, it makes you an interesting person because you know so much more than people think."

"You've always had away with words," I smile and shrug.

I then say "Little Edwards isn't too bad, I mean you are younger than her."

"How would you like to be called little Torres?"

"I wouldn't but it's better than having his last name."

"Torres isn't your last name?"

"No, when Mum married Drew's Dad they changed it to his."

"What was it before?"

"Thomas."

"Adam Thomas, what's you middle name?"

"John."

"Adam John Thomas, I like it."

"But do you know what sounds better?"

"No."

"Adam John Edwards," I nervously say and wait for her reaction.

Clare smiles and said "Yeah that does sound better."

"I know tradition is you're meant to take my last name or keep yours but I don't really have a last name of my own, besides who cares about tradition anyway."

"Yeah and it does sound better."

"You don't mind though?"

"Not at all, I never really wanted to give up my last name and now you can share mine."

"Awesome, now we can be little Edwards together."

"No Adam, just no."

"It was worth a thought though."

"True but no."

"Alright, don't be mad at your sister for wanting an education be happy that she wants to go back to school most kids hate going to school."

"Yeah okay, thanks Adam."

"Anytime Clare," I then leant forward and pecks her lips.

Looking deeply into Clare's eyes, I take a deep breath before saying "I love you Clare Edwards."

Clare smiles at me and said "That's the first time you've said that to me."

"I know, I do love you Clare."

"I love you to Adam," smiling at each other we both then lean in and kiss each other.

"Now can we eat some food I'm hungry," Clare just smiles and shakes her head at me. Standing up I grab both plates and place them down on the bed before sitting back down on the bed in front of Clare, we both smile at each other and then tuck into our food while making simple and easy conversation.


	2. Chapter 2

Waking up to the feel of someone kissing my lips, made me smile and slowly opening my eyes to find Clare's face hovering above mine.

"Morning Adam."

"Morning Clare," I reach up to kiss her back.

"How did you sleep?"

"Your couch is so uncomfortable."

I hear a voice say "Sorry Adam," sitting up I see it was Darcy.

"It's fine Darcy," I smile reassuringly.

I then asked "How'd you sleep Clare?"

"Very well thanks Adam," she leant over the couch to kiss me again.

Jake walks in groaning and saying "To early for you two to be all happy," we just laugh and go back to kissing.

Clare then said "Go shower, the bathroom is free and I'll get your breakfast ready."

Smiling I say "I have the best girlfriend ever," I stand up and move around the couch to now be standing next to Clare.

"And don't you forget it," was Clare's responds before kissing me and pushing me towards the stairs. After finishing showering, my bathroom routine and getting dressed, I was finally looking alright to leave the bathroom and as I was leaving Jake was walking up the stairs.

Jake said "Looking good."

"Thanks, do you have a blue hoodie I could possible borrow?"

"Sure, follow me." I followed him down the hallway and into his room; this was the first time being in his room ever. It was the same size as Clare's but everything inside was either black, grey or white and it looked extremely cool.

"Here you go," I hear him say before something hits me in the face.

"Thanks," I put the hoodie on and it hits perfectly.

"No problem, I'll see you at school," I nod my head before walking out of his room and heading downstairs for the kitchen/dining room area. Walking into the dining room, I saw two piece of toast and a bowl of cocoa puffs sitting on the table where I sat, as well as a cup of coffee.

Smiling I say "I have the best girlfriend ever."

Darcy walked out of the kitchen saying "Yeah, you do," I smile at her but smile even bigger when I see Clare walking out behind her.

"Hey, thank-you so much for making breakfast."

"It was my pleasure," I wrapped my arms around Clare and gave her a proper good morning kiss as well as a thank-you.

We then hear Darcy say "Ew," I just smile and deepen the kiss.

Mrs Martins voice comes in saying "Alright, knock it off you two," I get hit in the back of the head by a newspaper and it makes me flinch. Pulling out of the kiss, I see it's just Glen and I let out a deep breath.

Clare whispers "Are you okay?" I nod my head and take my sit at the table. I go straight into eating my cocoa puffs and drink my coffee, I feel Clare place a reassuring hand on the top of my leg and I looked at her, she giving me this intense look and I give it back to her.

We are broken out of it by Mrs Martin asking "Isn't that Jake's hoodie?"

I replied with "Yeah it is, I'm borrowing it," Mrs Martins nods her head understanding. I go back to eating my breakfast but I can still feel Clare's eyes on me, looking back at her and she still has these intense eyes.

Leaning forward to her ear I whisper "I'm okay, relax please," Clare nods her head and I peck her cheek before once again returning to my breakfast.

Mrs Martin asked "How are you getting to the high school today Darcy?"

I quickly say "I can give you a lift if you want."

Darcy replied with "That would be great, I was going to ask but I wasn't sure," I smiled, nodded my head and returned to eating.

I say "I'll finish breakfast, clean up, have a quick smoke and then we can go yeah?"

Clare replied with "Sounds good," Darcy nods her head. When I'd finished eating, I stacked all my dishes up as well as Clare and carried them into the kitchen. The sink was already filled with water so I carefully placed the dishes into the sink; I then got to work on making them clean and spotless. Feeling arms wrap around my waist made me jump because I thought I was alone but when I smelt Clare's perfume and felt Clare's lips against my neck I relaxed.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just not really good at the whole being sneaked up on thing."

"Right sorry."

"No it's okay," I looked back into her eyes so she knew it was alright. Facing the sink I got back to scrubbing the dishes clean while Clare stayed standing behind me, every now and then I'd hear her take a deep inhale before exhaling and lightly pecking me in between my shoulder blades. The minute I had finished with all the dishes I turned around in Clare's arm and would've wrapped my arms around her if they weren't wet.

"I'll have a quick smoke and then we'll leave yeah?"

"Yeah alright."

"I love you."

"I love you too Adam," Clare leant up and we pecked each other's lips over and over again.

Clare then said "Go, go have your smoke and then we can go to school."

"Alright, love you Clare Edwards," I smiled at her before she lets me out of her arms and I leave the kitchen to go outside onto the front porch to have my smoke.

Turning off the engine to my car, Darcy said "It still looks the same."

Clare replied with "What did you expected? For it to all just magically change, it's Degrassi Darcy not a school from a movie."

Darcy said "That's true, I just thought it might've gotten painted or something but it's still just plain old Degrassi High," I got out of the car with Darcy and Clare following behind me.

As we start heading towards the school I say "Oh yeah Darcy watch out for my brother Drew, he will hit on you. He may seem like a great guy but he is a total  
player, so don't fall for his charm you'll just end in heart break."

Darcy nodded and asked "How do I know what Drew looks like?"

I replied with "He'll introduce himself."

Darcy said "Right."

I then say "Dallas a guy who hangs out with him, a hockey player his alright."

Darcy nods and replied with "Thanks for the heads up Adam."

"No problem."

Clare said "Believe me, you'll need it," we smile at each other before we hear Alli and Jenna's voice yelling out Clare's name. Turning around we see Alli, Jenna and Connor all running over towards us, we stop and wait for them to catch up.

When they do Alli said "Clare told us you were home but I had to see it for myself before I actually believed it."

Darcy replied with "Bhandari nice to see you as always," Alli and Darcy hug each other.

Jenna said "Yeah I'm seeing it but I still don't believe it."

Darcy replied with "Jenna," they hugged as well but with Connor they just waved at each other.

Connor asked "What are you doing here?"

Darcy replied with "I'm coming to see Mr Simpson, see if there's any chance of me coming back to school."

Alli asked "For real?" Clare and Darcy both nodded their heads.

Jenna said "That's cool; I hope he lets you come back."

Connor asked "Will that mean Clare will go back to being known as little Edwards?"

Clare slapped my shoulder and said "See I told you that would happen," Clare started to walk away from me but I grabbed a hold of her hand before she could get further away.

I replied with "And what did I tell you? Little Edwards together right?"

Clare smiled and said "I thought you were joking when you said that."

I responded with "Nope, not one bit."

Clare said "Little Edwards together."

I said back "You know it and forever and ever too."

Clare asked "Really?"

I answered with "You know it," Clare leant forward to kiss me and I kissed her back. As we finished kissing we rested our foreheads against each other's, looked into each other's eyes and smiled.

Alli then said "Okay would you two stop being so dam cute."

I replied back with "Not me, it's all her," Clare smiled at me and I smiled back when I saw the blush rise up on her cheeks.

Alli said "Just stop it."

I replied with "Alli it's not me, it's Clare," Clare pecked my cheek and smiled at her. The bell then rang and all of us besides Connor and Darcy groaned, we all smiled at each other and slowly start to walk into the school.

Clare asked "Do you want me to come see Simpson with you?"

Darcy replied with "No, it's alright I can handle it."

I asked "Can I walk you to your locker Clare?"

Clare answered with "Yeah of course."

We both say "Good luck Darcy," before we walk off towards Clare's locker. We walked hand in hand together almost skipping to Clare's locker we were really happy, when we got to Clare's locker she opened it and I leant against the one next to hers.

I asked "What do you have?"

Clare replied with "Science, we both do with Connor, Jenna and Alli."

I say "That's right; Drew and Dallas are in that class as well."

Clare replied with "Yeah they are," I nod my head sadly.

Clare asked "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine really."

"As long as you're sure."

"Yeah I am, come on we better get to class," Clare finishes collecting her books and closes her locker, we start walking in the direction of our Science class.

Clare asked "Don't you need your books?"

I answered with "No, they're in my bag," Clare nodded and we continued on our way.

* * *

Walking into our Science classroom, we automatically walked over to where Connor, Jenna and Alli were siting, Clare sat down next Alli and I sat the other side of her. When I saw Drew and Dallas walk into the room, we looked at each other and they just continued on to their own desk, I felt a hand on the top of my leg and I saw it was Clare's hand. Following her fingers, hand, arm, shoulder and all the way up to her face, Clare was looking at me with concern filled eyes and I leant forward to peck her on the cheek. It was ten minutes into class and the teacher still hadn't come in; we were all looking around at each other trying to work out what to do whether we should stay or go. Mr Simpson then walked in with our science teacher Mr Blam and Darcy behind him; I looked at Clare to make sure was okay before looking at Drew already checking her out.

Mr Simpson said "I'm sorry for the delay everyone, I would like you to all welcome a new student joining us today Darcy Edwards," everyone kind of looks back around at Clare before going back to looking at Mr Simpson.

He continues on with "Darcy will join this science class and some of your other classes please make her feel welcome," he gave us his stare before leaving the classroom.

Mr Blam said "Welcome to the school Darcy, would you like to tell the class a little bit about yourself?"

Darcy replied with "I've been to Degrassi before it's not my first time being here, I left due to personal reason and yes I am Clare's older sister."

Mr Blam said "Thank-you Darcy, please take a seat and we can start the lesson," I saw Drew trying to signal her over to sit next to her, Darcy looked at me and I shook my head. Darcy walked over to our desk and took the last sit at our desk that was next to Connor, I smiled at her and she mouthed a thank-you. I felt Clare rest her head on my shoulder and I wrapped my arm around her, I laid my head down on top of hers and we listen to what Mr Blam was saying.

Mr Blam talking "For the next two week you will be put into groups of threes, in those groups you will come up with a topic of Science to research and you get to choose your topic but not your groups," we all groaned and I knew Clare and I weren't going to get paired up together.

Mr Blam said "Group one Clare, Alli and Jenna," the three looked at each other, smiled and high-fived.

Mr Blam continued "Group two Dallas, Drew and James," I let out deep breath of relief I thought he was going to pair me up with them.

Mr Balm said "Group three Darcy, Connor and Adam," the three of us looked at each other and nodded our heads happy with our group. Mr Blam read out the other groups but I didn't care because it didn't concern me, so I didn't have to worry.

He then said "By the end of this lesson you will all have your topic chosen and have told me, you have two weeks to complete this assignment and will be presented orally in front of the whole class. This assignment goes towards half of your grade this year which means it's really important, no screwing around guys. The library is free to use, just let me know when you are going to use it and can one member from each group come up to collect the assignment sheet please." Jenna went for her group, Darcy went for us and I saw Drew go up for his group. I watched Drew closely as he lightly grazed Darcy arm and probably told her that it sucked they weren't working together, I watched as Darcy blew him off and walked back with the assignment sheet.

Mr Blam said "Get to work people," he clapped his hands for us to start and we did. Connor moved his stuff and his chair down next to me, Darcy moved up a little bit.

I asked "Any ideas?"

Darcy replied with "No, I suck at Science."

I replied with "Same," we both high-fived.

Clare said "That's not something to be proud of," we just shrugged our shoulders.

Connor said "Well I am."

Darcy and I both say at the same time "We know," Connor smiles at us.

I asked "So what are we going to do?"

Connor replied with "Volcanos."

Darcy answered with "Yeah we should totally do that," I nodded my head agreeing.

Connor said "Alright, we can build a volcano and do research on what happens when a volcanos erupted, the effects of living near them and all that other stuff."

I replied with "Sounds good Connor."

Darcy asked "Are you at our place again tonight?"

I answered with "Yeah, I'm there every night."

Darcy said "Okay, then Connor you can come to our place after school and we can work on it."

Connor replied with "Yeah alright, I'll need a lift though."

I say "I've got a car, I take it you need a lift home?"

Darcy responded with "Yeah, I don't really feel like walking home."

Nodding I say "Just give me a second," they both nodded and I kissed Clare's neck to get her attention.

Clare asked "What's up?"

I replied with "It's alright if Connor and I come over tonight to work on our project."

Clare said "Yeah of course, Jenna and Alli are coming over as well to work on ours."

I nodded and replied with "Nice, have you chosen a topic?"

Alli answered with "Yeah windmills," I nodded my head along with other two.

Jenna asked "What about you guys?"

Connor replied with "Volcanos."

Clare said "Sound messy, are you going to build a volcano?"

Darcy replied with "Yeah, how can you do a volcano project without creating a volcano."

Alli said "She has a point," we all nodded our heads.

Darcy then said "I've let Jake, Mum and Glenn know about you all coming over just so there not surprised when a car full of kids burst into their house."

Clare replied with "That was nice of you."

I asked "Are you two okay with getting there because I only have one seat left."

Darcy replied with "I can get Jake to give me a lift home."

I say "Alright, then I can drive you all to Clare's place."

Jenna said "Thanks Adam," I smiled at them. Looking over at Drew, I saw he kept looking back over here and more at Darcy then the rest of us.

I whisper into Clare's ear "If he looks at her one more time, I swear I'm going to kill him," I could feel my knee starting to tap.

Clare looked over at Drew and back to me, she said "Relax."

I replied with "I can't, it feels like hours since my last smoke."

Clare asked "Is it really that bad?"

I answered with "Yeah," we look into each other eyes and I can see Clare reading them. I found it weird when she told me she liked to read my eyes, I didn't understand what she meant and she explain that when she reads my eyes, she can see if I'm telling the truth or not.

Clare then said "Wait here," I watched as she stood up from her chair and left to go talk to Mr Balm.

Jenna asked "What she doing?"

I answered with "I got no idea," I felt my knee starting to tap out of control.

Darcy asked "Are you okay?"

I replied with "No, not really," I tried to get my knee to stop but it wouldn't.

Clare walk back over saying "I told Mr Blam what our two groups topics are and told him we are going to library, Adam you can go have a smoke and you'll be away from Drew."

I smile say "Best girlfriend ever," I leant forward and pecked Clare on the lips.

Clare replied with "I'd do anything to make sure you're okay."

I nod and say "I know, I love you."

Clare replied with "Love you too, now go smoke and I'll see you in the library."

I asked "You two are alright if I go have a smoke?"

Connor answered with "Yeah, if it stops your knee from bouncing," I looked at Darcy and she nodded her head. Grabbing my bag from the floor, I leave the classroom to go have a smoke which will hopefully calm me down and I won't rip Drew's head off or worse.

* * *

Clare's P.O.V

Darcy and Connor left soon after Adam for the library, they were going to wait for us but we told them to go ahead. The three of us packed up our stuff and left for the library as well, I was extremely worried about Adam it's never been this bad before, normally he can hold out until lunch or the whole day but today was different.

"Clare watch out," I hear Alli say before pulling me away from walking into a pole.

I reply "Sorry."

Jenna asked "Where's your head at?"

I answered with "Sorry I was just thinking about Adam."

Alli asked "Yeah is he okay?"

"I have no idea, I think that his family not caring about him is really starting to get to him and last night we had a serious conversation that probably brought up a lot up for him."

Jenna said "It suck his family barely care for him."

Alli add "Yeah, I don't get why they don't care for him."

I reply with "Me neither and I hate it."

Jenna then asked "When did the L words start being said?"

Smiling I replied with "Just last night, we kind of went to a new level last night."

Alli asked "Don't tell me you mean?"

Rolling my eyes I say "No Alli, we did talk about it but we're both not ready and he needs to feel comfortable with his body."

Jenna replied with "That's understandable, is he getting the surgery for that?"

I answered with "I don't know, we haven't talked about it. Last I heard him say was there was a chance spring break he'd get his chest surgery done but with his family the way it is I don't know if it'll happen."

Jenna said "That sucks."

"Tell me about it."

Alli asked "So if sex wasn't your next level than what was it?"

"We became more open with each other, I know we've dating for a long time but it's still hard being honest with each other no matter how long you've been together."

Alli said "That sounds really great."

"It is, I love him and I can really see this going somewhere."

Jenna asked "What was with the little Edwards together out the front of school?"

"Last night when Darcy told us she was coming back to school I got upset because I would be known as little Edwards or the freaky sister. Adam to trying to cheer up said we could be little Edwards together, meaning that if we get married he would become an Edwards."

Alli said "That's crazy but really great."

"Yeah, it is but to understand why you need more of the story but Adam told me not to tell anyone."

Jenna replied with "We totally understand there are just somethings you can't tell your best friends about your boyfriend."

"Exactly, now we better actually do some researching," I said as we walked into the library, we had taken the really long way here just to do some talking.

Alli suggested "Okay Jenna why don't you look for book while Clare and I use the internet."

Jenna said back "Yeah alright," I nodded my head and followed Alli to go get a laptop. We went to sit at the same table as Connor and Darcy, it was big and would sit all of us and we wouldn't distract each other. Ten minutes straight of doing work and Adam still hadn't come back from his smoke it really made me worried but I knew he just need to calm down before coming back. Looking to the library door, I groaned when I saw who just walked in.

Connor asked "You okay Clare?"

I replied with "They are trying to kill him," I point to who I'm meaning and they all turn to see Drew, Dallas and the other guy walk in.

Jenna asked "Didn't Adam go to have a smoke because of Drew?"

I answered with "Yeah, he was ready to kill him just for looking at you," I nod my head at Darcy.

Darcy said "Wow."

Alli said "Oh no."

Jenna asked "What?"

Alli replied with "He is coming over."

I say "Turn him down Darcy, he will hurt you."

Darcy replied with "His not even my type."

Connor said "Good," we all smiled at Connor protective nature over us; it only really built when he and Jenna started to date. Which at first seemed crazy and weird but as time built around their relationship it was almost like why haven't you been dating and they were super cute together.

Drew arrives over at us and said "Hi I'm Drew Torres, Adam's brother."

Darcy replied with "Yeah, he might've mentioned you a few times."

Drew said "Cool, it's a bummer you're not in my group."

Darcy replied with "Yeah real bummer," I heard that tone in Darcy voice it was her bored one. I groaned internally when I saw Adam walk in, why did he have to come back from his smoke right at this point. Drew kept trying to hit on Darcy who acted interested but everyone could tell by now she wasn't; even Connor could. I saw Darcy eyes twitch a little when she saw Adam standing there but acted normal.

Darcy cut him off with "Look, I'm just not interested in any relationship. I'm back here to learn, to get more knowledge and that's all I'm interested in at the moment."

Drew kept trying "On come on, I bet we'd have a lot of fun together," I just saw Adam see red then. With knowing about Darcy past and having the past he had it was just the worst possible thing for Drew to have said. I watched as Adam turned Drew around to face him before picking him up off the ground, then dropping him off the back of his shoulder and Drew hit the ground fast. Adam turned around to see where Drew had land, he then got down on top of Drew, flipped him over onto his back and twist one of his arms around behind his back.

Drew shouts "Dude! What's your problem?" Adam only pulls it back harder. It is really hard to see Adam like this, I've never seen him this angry before and the smoke had clearly not help or if it had seeing Drew hitting on Darcy probably pushed him over the edge. Adam was able to move Drew around back to be facing Darcy but still his arm twisted around his back, which looked extremely painful.

Adam said "Apologise now!"

Drew replied with "For what? I didn't do anything!"

Adam said "That's right Drew you never do anything, it's never you fault when actually it's entirely your fault!" I could see the pain in Adam eyes but it was only for a minute before the anger in them return.

Adam said again "Apologise for not taking no for an answer Drew!"

When Drew doesn't say anything Adam shouts "Now!" Adam pulls Drew by the hair so he is looking up at Darcy. Looking around I see everyone in the library has wonder over to see what's going on and Dallas is standing there conflicted. Drew was about to say something when Dallas pushed Adam off of Drew and helped Drew stand up, Adam went to charge at both of them but Connor stood up just in time to stop him and Dallas held Drew back.

Drew shouted "What the hell is your problem!?"

Adam shouted back "You!"

Drew said "All I did was talk to a girl."

Adam replied with "A girl who is off limits to you Drew."

Drew asked back "Why? You into her or something?" Adam went to charge at Drew again but Connor was able to stop him once again.

Adam said "No Drew, she is my girlfriend's sister and she deserve better than you. She deserve better than your cheap jokes, cheap lines and cheap everything," I saw that Darcy was flattered by what Adam said. I wasn't really surprised that Adam already felt protective over Darcy; it was just who he was and he would protect anyone who was a part of my family. I was knocked out of my thoughts by Alli bumping my shoulder and telling me to go calm Adam down, I nodded my head and I stood to walk over to him. Connor moved so I could now stand in front of Adam but he didn't move to far in case Adam tried to charge at Drew again.

I say "Adam," trying to break him out of the stare he was giving Drew

"Adam," I say again and this time he looks at me.

"Please stop, he isn't worth it. Darcy doesn't like him and isn't interested in him."

"Good," Adam said. Thinking everything has been solved Connor and I move away from Adam and Dallas is pushing Drew back but it's too late when we realise that Drew has escaped Dallas grip and has tackled Adam to the ground. I watched as Adam head hit the ground really hard, Drew started to punch Adam in the face over and over again. I was worried that Adam hadn't move since hitting his head on the ground but he soon started to punch Drew hard in the stomach. The punch winded Drew and he left his guard open to be flipped, Adam got on top of Drew and starts to punch Drew wherever he could.

Feeling Connor tap my shoulder, he pointed over to the door and I groaned when I saw Mr Simpson walk in; the librarian must've called him down. He walked over, whispered something into Dallas ear and then Connor's. Dallas and Connor walked over to Drew and Adam, Connor carefully pulled Adam off of Drew and Dallas picked Drew up from the floor; they held onto them tightly. Looking at Drew I saw his lip was busted and he would have a nice black eye in the morning, Adam would as well but his nose had been broken and his lip was busted as well; which would make it really hard to kiss him.

Mr Simpson said "My office now!" he was not happy at all. Both Dallas and Connor lead their respective person out of the library and all the way to Mr Simpsons office I assumed, I wish I could go with but I couldn't.

* * *

Adam's P.O.V

As we got closer and closer to Mr Simpson office, I could see Mum standing there not impressed and I knew who she wasn't impressed with; me.

I say to Connor "I'm sorry I wasn't much help with the project."

Connor replied with "It's not okay but I understand Adam and I know you'll be more helpful this afternoon and the next days."

I say back "Thanks and I promise I will be, I'm really interested in the topic we chose."

Connor replied with "Me too," we both shared a smile before we reach our destination. I can't remember the last time I'd actually seen my Mother; it would almost have to be nearly a month or so.

Mr Simpson said "I took the liberty of calling your Mum down before coming to break up your fight."

I replied with "My Mum's not here Mr Simpson."

Mum gave me a glare and Mr Simpson asked "What are you talking about Adam?"

I answered with "She has never been my Mum and she isn't about to be today," I gave my mother a glare right back.

Mr Simpson asked "Is there someone else I can call?"

I replied with "Glen Martin, Jake's Dad and Clare and Darcy's stepdad," Connor and Dallas both left to go back to the library I assumed.

Mr Simpson said "Okay, I'll call him down and once he is here we will all talk," I nodded my head. I would have said Mrs Martins but I knew she was busy at work today and Glen didn't have a job today unless he had gotten a sudden call today; but sadly it rarely happens. It was about 20 minutes later before Glen walked over when he saw mine and Drew face he looked shocked.

He asked "You alright kid?"

I replied with "Yeah just a couple of hits no biggy."

Glen said "Alright," I smiled at him before Mr Simpson walked out of his office than it all turned serious.

Mr Simpson said "I'm glad you could join us Mr Martins but I'm sorry it's under these circumstances."

Glen replied with "Please call me Glen for starters and me to but I'm happy to be here for Adam," we shared a smile this was the father-son relationship I'd always dreamed of but had taken away from me.

Mr Simpson said "Please all come in," he stepped back and we all shuffled into his office. I took the seat furthest away from Drew and the feeling was mutual when he did the same and the two adult sat in between us. Mr Simpson closed the door and moved around his desk to take a seat.

Mr Simpson said "Boys would you like to explain to your parents why we are all here?" I didn't have any smart come back so I just stay quiet and Drew did the same thing.

Mr Simpson said "No, okay I will. Drew you were talking with Darcy, Adam you started fighting with Drew. The fight looked to be finished but Drew you tackled Adam to the ground and you two fought some more. Is that how it went or is there more to it?"

Drew replied with "That's all that happened."

I answered back with "There's more to it," I saw Glen look at me interested.

Mr Simpson said "Please explain Adam."

I replied with "Drew was hitting on Darcy Edwards, Clare's older sister. Darcy told Drew she was only interested in her studies and wasn't interested in any relationships what so ever, but Drew wouldn't take no for an answer. Knowing what I know, I flipped out and start the fight with Drew. I'll admit I started the fight but was happy to walk away after he apologized but no apologise came." I could see Glen and Mr Simpson understood now why I flipped out; they don't know the whole details but can understand with Darcy past.

Mr Simpson asked "Drew anything to add?"

Drew replied with "No," I was a little shocked he hadn't try to defend himself or Mum hadn't flipped out by now.

Mr Simpson said "Fighting, Violence is not tolerated at this school and you both know this, Drew because this isn't your first fight at this school and have been given many warnings, I have no further choice then to give you a two week suspension. Where you will think about your actions, you will be given homework from all of your teachers, which will be expected to have been finished by the end of those two weeks. Adam as this is your first major breach of the school rules, I am giving you a warning, a one warning only if you are caught fighting again doesn't matter who, suspension will be given to you. You two are both seniors of this school, Drew you are school captain the student body see your actions and think that's how they get too acted but it is not. While you are out Drew, Clare will take your stop as school captain and watch out Drew she could take your place if this attitude keeps up."

Mr Simpson continued with "Drew your suspension starts now, you have ten minutes to collect all your things and leave," Drew nodded his head. I was still surprised Mum hadn't said anything yet.

Mr Simpson said "Thank-you Glen and Audrey for coming in," we all stood up and the adults shook hands. Walking out of Mr Simpson office, I saw Clare standing over by the wall and I smiled when I saw her but it faded because I knew Mum was going to shout.

Here it goes "How dare you not call me your Mother and get someone we don't even know for your defence."

I shout back "You're not my Mother, you never have been and never will be. I do know him, he is like a Father to me and one day he will be my Father-in-law." I saw Clare shocked face along with everyone else, I could all see them thinking has he proposed to Clare.

Mum said "I am your Mother and I am disappointed with you for fighting with your own Brother."

I say back "You are not my Mother, he is not my Brother and tell me something I don't know. I know you're disappointed in me, I know. You tell me every single day when you don't call me or ask where I am, why I'm not home or why I'm at Clare's."

Mum said "That girl has turned you against us."

I shout "No, don't you dare say a bad word about my girlfriend that you haven't even bothered to get to know. She is the best thing to ever happen to me, her whole family is the best thing to happen to me. I have a Mum or well a Mrs Martins, I have a Dad or really Glen, I have a Brother named Jake, I have a sister named Darcy who I only met yesterday and I have a girlfriend named Clare. They are more of a family than you ever were Mum, you were never my Mum. The minute you let things happen, the way they did that is when you stopped but it was before that when you married him. You've been disappointed in me my whole life, why because I knew who I was, I knew I'm not meant to be a female, I am meant to be a boy and you just couldn't understand that. I don't blame you for not understanding but for being disappointed in me because of that fact, is why you aren't my Mum. I have been living at Clare's place for three months now, not once have you called, not once have you asked and not once have you cared. Do you want to know why I'm at Clare's because I feel so god dam uncomfortable in my own house, which should not be but it is. I feel so uncomfortable around you and Drew that I need a smoke every time Drew is in the room because I can't stand to be near him. You were never my Mother and now you will just be that women who let that man do those things to me," I took in a load of deep breaths. I had just let that women know what I think of her, in the process revealing things to Glen I wasn't ready to but it was okay because that women knew. Feeling someone place their arms around me, I saw they were Clare's arms and I smiled back at her; I could see the proud look in her eyes.

That women then said "You are no longer welcome in this house or this family, no one talks to me like that and I will not be disrespected like that," she turned and walked away with Drew following behind her. I felt crushed, sadden by her saying those words and they kept repeating in my head, standing up came too hard so I eventually sat with Clare following me.

I said "She kicked me out, my Mother kicked me out."

I saw Glen face pop up in front of mine and he said "It all going to be okay Adam, tonight we will talk about it."

I say "We have people coming over for the study session."

Clare replied with "We will cancel it for tomorrow instead they will understand," I slowly nod my head. I still couldn't believe it, she actually kicked me out.

Glen then said "You two have classes to get to, we will talk after school."

I replied with "Okay," I saw Clare nod her head and Glen left to return home.

Clare asked "Are you okay?"

I answered with "I feel numb," Clare than start to expect my face for injuries.

Clare said "We should get the nurse to look at that face of yours."

"Yeah, I think that would be good idea." Clare stood up first, she held out her hand for me to take and when I did she helped me stand up.

"Thanks," I say before wrapping my arm around Clare. As we start to walk towards the nurse's office, I feel Clare slip her hand into my pants back pocket and it makes me smile.


	3. Chapter 3

It was now lunch time, in the nurse's office where I had to have my nose put back in place since it had actually been broken and it was now in a splint and would remain in it for three week. I had my lip stitched up and they weren't going to come out for a week, the nurse told me I would have a really good black eye in the morning. I knew I had bruises forming under my shirt and binder but I couldn't look and I didn't want anyone else to, so it would have to wait until I got home from school. After going to see the nurse who wrote Clare and I both late slips for our classes, we went to our own classes and I was really happy the time lunch came around; I was missing her. Walking into the cafeteria in my thoughts I accidently bumped into someone; which hurt the bruises forming under my shirt, looking up to see it was Jake.

Jake said "Wow what happened to your face?"

I replied with "Drew happened," Jake nodded understanding.

I then say "I got blood on your hoodie, I'm so sorry."

Jake said "It's no biggy, it'll wash out."

I nod and reply with "Yeah."

Jake asked "So what happened?"

I answered with "The ass whole wouldn't take no for an answer."

With Jake's confused look, I explain "He was hitting on Darcy, she said no and he wouldn't take it."

Jake replied with "Well I'm glad you did something or I would've," we both smiled at each other.

I say "Well his face looks the same as mine."

Jake replied with "Good," we both nodded our heads.

Jake said "I'll see you at home."

I replied with "Yeah," we shook hands before stepping around each other and I continued my way over to where everyone was sitting; including Clare. Reaching the table, I pecked Clare on the lip which actually hurt and I was going to be annoyed if this cut our kissing times back.

Clare asked "You okay?"

I replied with "Yeah, just the stitches pulled when I kissed you."

Clare said "Don't tell me we are going to have to stop kissing?"

I answered with "Nah never."

I went to kiss her again but Darcy interrupted us by saying "Just what every big Sister wants to hear from her little Sister boyfriend."

I replied with "Right," I smiled and Darcy rolled her eyes.

Jenna then said "I didn't think you were that badly injured," I just shrugged and stole some of Clare's fries.

Darcy said "You didn't have to have that fight with Drew just because he hit on me."

I replied with "Oh believe me I did and it was a long time coming, Drew just didn't know it," picking up a fry from Clare's plate, I brought it to her mouth and she ate it.

Alli asked "Does your nose hurt?"

I replied with "No," I ate some more of Clare's fries.

Remembering what Mr Simpson said, I say "Clare I forgot to tell you with Drew being suspended for two weeks guess who gets to be school captain," I gave her the look that said her.

Clare replied with "No way, really?"

I said "Yeah and if things go well you might take Drew's place for good."

Clare replied with "That would be amazing," I nodded my head and kissed her on the cheek which again hurt my lips.

I then heard a deep voice behind me say "Adam," only one person I know has that deep voice and that was Dallas.

Sighing I say "What do you want Dallas?" I turned around to see he had three bags on his shoulders and another in his hand.

Dallas replied with "Your Mum packed up the last of your things and want me to give them to you."

I said back "That's just great," he moved around and placed them on the table in front of me.

Dallas said "I'm sorry things with your Mum turned out like they did."

I replied with "Yeah, well I guess this means you're out of the den and up in my room now."

Dallas said "Something like that."

I replied back with "Great, you and Drew can go be the perfect children she always wanted, you're not daughters but it's still better than having a freak of a son."

Dallas said "Adam that's not how it is."

I replied with "No Dallas that's exactly how it is, always has been and it always will be."

Dallas said "Well then I'll see you around Adam," he turned around and walked away.

Connor is the first one to speak "That was intense."

Followed by Jenna asking "You're Mum kicked you out?"

And then lastly Clare with "Are you okay?"

I replied with "No kidding, yeah and just crystal Clare," I fake a smile at her and she gives me her sad eyes

I say "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap or be angry."

Clare replied with "It's okay, what did you have left there anyway?"

I answered back with "A lot apparently," I unzipped the closet bag to me and started to look through it.

Alli asked "What's in it?"

I replied with "The comic books Eli and I collected, he gave me all of his saying he was too old for them but you're never too old for comic books," I smiled as I started to look through the collection. Comic books was the main thing that got me through all the hard times, just being able to switch off from the world and be in someone else reality instead of your own.

Darcy asked "Whose Eli?" we all looked up at each other before all looking at Clare.

Clare replied with "He was my boyfriend before Adam."

I say as well "He was also my friend."

Darcy replied with "Okay."

I say "It's not as bad as it seems, see I liked Clare pretty much from the moment we meet but Eli wanted to date Clare and he did. I didn't want to ruin that then one day they tell me they are breaking up, Clare is crying a lot; I think for three months straight and then we got together."

Clare slapped me and replied with "I did not cry that much."

I said "You did too and you ate a lot of ice-cream."

Clare slapped me again, I went to say something but Jenna cut me off with "Adam just be quiet, no girl wants to be reminded of what they did through a break up."

I replied with "That's not even the half of it."

Alli said "Adam, you'll become the titanic soon if you don't shut up."

Jenna picked up one of my comics and said "Here, read," I took the comic book from her hands. Flipping through the pages of the comic book, I remember saving up all my money just to be able to buy this issue of spider-man vs green goblin. As I kept turning the pages, I came to the middle of the comic where I found a picture and I just couldn't believe it. Picking the photo up, I turn it around and see it has 'Gracie's first Christmas sitting on Santa's lap,' but it was my Dad.

Darcy asked "Adam, are you okay?"

Looking up I say "It is so like that women to put that photo in here," I let it fall from my hands and they can all see the photo.

Connor asked "Whose the girl?" I can feel the tear already starting to roll down my cheeks, I didn't want them to fall but they did and I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to stop them.

Clare picks up the photo and reads "Gracie's first Christmas sitting on Santa's lap," she turns the photo over and examines it again. I can see her looking at the man in the photo and then looking at me over and over again, when she comes to the realisation she drops the photo too; like it burnt her.

Alli asked "What's wrong Clare?"

Clare ignores her and said "It's him isn't it?" I slowly nod my head and she wraps her arms around me; tightly too.

Darcy asked "Whose Gracie?"

I reply with "Me," I watch as shock comes up onto Darcy's face before understandings comes through; which is on everyone's face.

I say "I need smoke, I'm going to take these to the car and have a smoke," I looked into Clare's eyes.

Clare replied with "Yeah alright," I smile at her really small before putting all the comics back into the bag. I kiss Clare on the top of her head before grabbing all three bags and walking away, out of the cafeteria to go and have a smoke.

* * *

Darcy and I were leaning up against my car waiting for Clare to be done with her school council meeting, I was having a smoke and Darcy was just sitting there enjoying the sun.

Darcy then asked "How did you know?"

I asked back "Know what?"

Darcy replied with "How did you know that you were meant to be male and not female?"

I say "I just knew. When I'd look in a mirror and saw the reflection staring back at me, it didn't make sense when my brain told me I was a boy. It's just something I knew."

"What was it like coming to terms with it?"

"It was hard at first but then I learnt there was nothing wrong with me."

"There isn't anything wrong with you Adam."

"Yeah, I know. Sometimes I wish I wasn't like this, I wish I had been born a boy from the start and then everything would be fine."

"Maybe but you wouldn't have an interesting life like you do now."

"True but what's interesting when you get picked on every single day of your life just for being who you are."

"Are people picking on you?"

"It's not as bad as when they first found out but every now and then I get tripped or shoved into lockers, it's no big deal."

"How can you say it's not a big deal when it is?"

"Because I've had worse, what they do is nothing compare to at my old schools."

"What used to happen there?"

"I'd be pick on every single day, trip by any random person, shoved into lockers, horrible names, cyber bullying, nasty rumours being made about me and sometimes I'd get death threats."

"Death threats?"

"Yeah, a lot of people told me to kill myself and that's when I turned to burning myself."

"You self-harmed?"

"Yeah, being Gracie every single day was hard, then with the bullying on top of it I could never keep level and that's when I started to burn myself, it felt good for a while it took away the pain."

"You don't have to tell me, I know what you mean?"

"What do you mean?" I watch as Darcy slowly pushed up her sleeve to reveal a small cut, you couldn't really see it unless you were paying attention and then further up there were deeper ones; but they were all old.

I asked "When did you do that?"

"I started to have flashbacks of my attack, having it play over and over again in my head just made me feel dirty. Then I felt crazy because no one understood why I was acting out, almost threating to cut my hair off and then I found cutting took away the pain but it doesn't."

"Neither does burning."

"I showed you mine, you show me yours," Darcy said while rolling down her sleeve. I slowly pushed my sleeve up to reveal my burn marks from ages ago but one or two were only two years ago.

"There's more to your story isn't there?"

"Yes."

"You've had bad things happen to you?"

"Yes."

"One day when you're ready, I hope you'll tell me."

"Maybe one day, I only just got up the courage to tell Clare yesterday and she still doesn't know the full story."

"You can trust Clare."

"I know I can, it's just a lot to take in at once."

"Understandable," even though I'd only known Darcy for a day and half it felt like we had this real connection. I didn't know how to explain it; it was like we understood each other more than anyone else could. I wasn't in love with her or anything like that, I only love Clare. It was maybe like a Brother and Sister connection but stronger, even stronger than a best friend; I just really don't know how to explain it.

Darcy broke me out of my thoughts by saying "Here they come," looking up I see them all walking out of the building. Crushing my smoke out on the ground with my foot as Clare and others walked over to us, when she reached us I kissed and hugged her.

Darcy asked "Good meeting?"

Jenna replied with "Yeah, we've got the ball rolling on the driving safety talk."

I say "Cool."

Alli said "We've able to book a police officer, a paramedic and a doctor to all come into talking to all the year levels."

Clare added on "Which will happen next week Wednesday."

I asked "What time?"

Connor replied with "Seniors will have the last session of the day."

Clare said "I didn't forget about your appointment."

I replied with "Thank-you."

Darcy asked "What appointment?"

I answered with "Doctor and my therapist, which I hope that women hasn't cancel I'll have to ring to check."

Jenna said "She wouldn't do that."

I replied with "Yeah she would," Clare nodded her head agreeing with me.

Clare then said "Anyway we better get going we still have that talk with Mum and Glen to have."

I replied with "Yes, how could I possible forget."

Clare said "It won't be too bad," I gave her a look and she just rolled her eyes at me.

Darcy asked "So you're all coming over tomorrow for the study session?"

Connor, Jenna and Alli all said at the same time "Yeah." After that the three of us said our goodbyes to the other three before getting into my car and I started to drive us to their place; which I was hoping would become my house.

* * *

Walking into Clare's house and into the living room we found Jake playing PlayStation, he looked up and waved at us.

Jake then said "My Dad and your Mum Clare are in the dining room waiting for you two to get home so you guys can talk, while Darcy and I stay out."

Clare replied with "Thanks."

Jake said "Your face looks a lot worse than it did at lunch."

I replied with "Thanks Jake always a pleasure," he smiled at me and Clare lead me into the dining room.

As we walked into the kitchen, Mrs Martins said "Oh my god," she then rushed over to check my face.

Mrs Martins asked "Are you okay?"

I replied with "Yeah I'm fine so far this day has been going great," she nodded her head understanding why I was being sarcastic.

Glen said "Why don't you two take a seat," Clare and I sat down at our normal places at the table but Mrs Martins and Glen were sitting in front of us.

Mrs Martins said "Glen has filled me in on everything that happen this morning at school, how you got into a fight with Drew because you were protecting Darcy. As Darcy mother I want to thank-you for doing that, I am scared about that happening again and I worry she's ready to be with guys again but your Brother is one I don't want to see her with," I nodded my head agreeing.

Mrs Martins went on with "I don't like violence being used ever; I don't want it in my house or for my daughters to be dating someone who uses violence."

Clare said "Mum."

Mrs Martins said "Let me finish. But this is the first ever fight you've been in and have never acted out, I'll let it go because you were protecting my daughter and that will always be in my good books."

Glen said "With that out the way, we can talk about the more serious issue."

Mrs Martins said "We are happy with you living here but a couch isn't the best thing for you to sleep on."

I asked "What does that mean?" I was confused if I didn't have a couch to sleep on what would I sleep on.

Mrs Martins replied with "We trust you both; I overheard your conversation yesterday about sex."

Clare cut her off with "Mum," I place my hand on the top of Clare's leg to calm her down.

Mrs Martins said "I didn't mean to Clare it just happened, anyway it is a relief to know that you two won't be having sex for a very long time," man could this conversation get any awkward I think to myself.

Glen said "What she is trying to say is, we trust you enough to let Adam move into your room," Clare and I both looked at each other with smiles on our faces.

Mrs Martins said "We don't know what's going to happen next year for you two with college and everything but we are going to assume you will be living together next year, this will give you the practice."

Clare replied with "Thank-you that is so cool of you."

I say "Yeah thank-you."

Glen said "But it comes with rules," we both sighed at the same time.

Mrs Martins said "You can keep the door closed when you are up there but that means no sex, kissing is allowed because no one can stop you kissing."

Glen replied with "Not true, food will stop Adam from kissing," I gasped in shock before nodding my head knowing he was right.

Mrs Martins said "You will respect each other boundaries, no changing in front of each other is a given and you must come out of the room for air sometime."

Clare asked "Is that it?"

Glen replied with "Yes."

Clare said "We can stick to those rules," Clare looked at me and I nodded my head.

Mrs Martins then said "Clare why don't you go start moving Adam things into your room while we talk to Adam."

Clare replied with "Okay," she looked at me to see if I was okay with it and I nodded my head. As soon as Clare left I felt the tension in the room turn really serious and it concerned me a little.

Mrs Martins said "With living under this roof there are rules, we understand that we can't get you to stop smoking but if you could cut them back it'd be nice."

I replied with "I'll try."

Mrs Martins said "Good, you'll get chores like Jake, Clare and Darcy has and you'll get a little pocket money like they do."

I replied with "Alright."

Mrs Martins said "You know most of the other rules so please stick to them."

I replied with "I will, is that all or?"

Glen said "No there's more. We understand who you are and accept it, we want you to know you have our full support behind you and with that we would like to pay for your surgeries."

I replied with "No, no that's not really necessary."

Mrs Martins said "It is, there is no way you could ever get enough money to pay for it yourself and until you have it done there will be this little barrier around you and Clare that can't cross."

I replied with "I understand that but really my surgery isn't going to be cheap."

Glen said "We know but we want to do it and we also want you to feel a part of this family, the family you told your Mum about. I am really honoured that you called me your Father and Helen your Mother, it was a proud moment for me."

I replied with "I have issues that Clare doesn't know the half of, you only know a quarter but I never got a Father figure and you are what I imagined a Father should be like."

Glen said "We understand you have your issues and I'm honoured at that as well. We want to pay for you to get your surgery done Adam so you can finally feel like the person you are meant to be, to be proud of what you see in the mirror. We also know you have a lot of baggage we see it in your eyes, we see it when you go out for a smoke, there is more to your story and we understand you're not ready to talk. But when you are ready we'll both be here, ready to talk to you and help you get through it all."

I replied with "Thank-you, it means a lot to me."

Mrs Martins asked "So will you let us pay for your surgery?"

I answered with "Yeah alright but only if you're sure."

Glen said "We are sure Adam."

I say "Cool, I have an appointment next Wednesday at the hospital with my doctor and therapist to talk about my surgeries."

Glen asked "Can we come?"

I replied with "Yeah, I was going to ask you to come but I kept forgetting."

Mrs Martins said "We'll be there."

I say "Alright," I smiled actually happy.

Glen said "Now go help Clare."

I replied with "Yes Sir," I did a salute that made them both laugh. Standing up from my spot at the table, I walked over to the door and just as I was about to walk out, I turned around and looked at Mrs Martins and Glen.

Mrs Martins asked "Everything okay?" I don't reply, I just walk over to them and hug them both before leaving the room once again to go help Clare move my stuff into her room.


	4. Chapter 4: Part 1

It had been three weeks since I had officially moved into Clare's house and it had been great, I got to have Clare fall asleep in my arms and wake up with her still there. The school councils drive safety day they had organised was a huge success with a lot of drivers taking the pledge not to text because it can wait, I was one of them and Clare was very proud of me. My nose, lip, eye and bruises on my rips were all healed which I was really grateful for. Jake and I had started an NBA tournament on the PlayStation, we were halfway to the grand finale and we couldn't wait to get to it. Darcy and I were like Brother and Sister now, it was awesome.

At school in science we had all presented out projects and were waiting for our grades to be given back, I was hoping we had all done well. When Drew had come back from suspension we avoid each other, barely even looking at each other or acknowledge the others presents. He wasn't hitting on Darcy, he was staying clear of her and other guys had asked Darcy out but they understood she just wanted to focus on her studies.

Mrs Martins and Glen had come with Clare and I to my doctor/therapist appoint, they filled them in on what was going on and my surgeries were all booked. I'd have my chest surgery done first day of Spring Break; which is three weeks away. I would be in hospital for the entire week of Spring Break, before spending the first two weeks off from school at home recovering. Then when summer break came I would get my other surgeries done, I couldn't wait for it by the end of the year I will be able to look in the mirror and finally see the person I've seen in my mind all long.

They had decided that taking T-shots was a good idea, which Glen and Mrs Martins were happy to pay for now. Walking towards my locker this morning, since Clare and I both needed stuff out of our lockers we decided to meet back up in science; where hopefully we'll get our grades. As I got closer to my locker I saw Drew standing there which confused me more than anything else, when I got even closer I saw he had this pale look on his face and I felt a little concern come through; I was human I did feel that for people.

Arriving there I say "Drew," he looks up and I see this almost scared look in his eyes.

He said "Adam."

I asked "What are you doing here?"

Drew replied with "I had to tell you something that you're not going to like."

I say "Okay," a little confused as to what's going on.

Drew said "Yesterday we're just about to sit down for dinner when the doorbell rang, I went to go get it and it was a man asking if our Mum was home. I shouted out for her to come to the door since it was for her, the minute Mum saw this man she started to cry and scream for my Dad to come kick this man out. While Dad was trying to he shouted that he would find Gracie and that she couldn't keep you away from him forever."

I asked "Who was the man Drew?"

Drew replied with "It was your Dad Adam," I looked at him to see if he was telling the truth.

I asked "Are you telling me the truth because if you're not this is just cruel even for you Drew."

Drew answered with "Yes it's the truth Adam, I wouldn't lie about that sort of thing," I saw in his eyes he was telling the truth and now I was truly scared.

I asked "Will he find me?"

Drew replied with "He was able to find out where your Mum lives after all these years, so."

I cut him off with "So yes, he'll find me," the thoughts of him finding me and what he would do to me start to go through my mind.

Drew then said "Your Mum didn't want you to know but I thought you needed to know."

Nodding I say "Thanks, we should umm…get to science, I don't want to be late," I turn away from him and start walking towards science. Walking into the room I felt like a lost puppy not really knowing what do to, what was the point of really doing anything when he was out there somewhere and could get me whenever he wanted. I felt hand place on my shoulder from behind which made me jump, I turn to see it's Drew hand and he has this concern look on his face.

I say "No, you don't get to suddenly be the big Brother Drew, if I want my big Brother I'll go to Jake before I ever come to you," I shoved his hand off and walked over to where Clare, Darcy, Alli, Jenna and Connor were all sitting; seeing and hearing everything that happened with Drew. Looking past them to see Dallas looking at me concerned just like Drew was and I thought to myself now that I'm in danger they suddenly care.

Sitting down next to Clare, I could feel her concern eyes on me and I shook my head at her; telling her not to ask anything and she nodded her head understanding. The next thought I had was enough to give any guy a heart attack, what if he came after Clare? Looking at Clare scared; I wrapped my arms around her and brought her closer to me. Clare sensing I need her close to me at this moment rested her head on my shoulder and pecks my neck with her lips.

Mr Blam walked into the classroom saying "Good Morning everyone, I know you have all been waiting for your grades and wait no more, I have them right here," he holds up all the colourful cupboard we had all use to put our information on.

He continued with "You may talk quietly while I hand them out," he started going around the room handing out the projects. Starting with the front tables, he slowly gets around to our table, he hands Jenna, Clare and Alli there's first before handing Connor, Darcy and I ours.

Clare asked "What did we get?"

Jenna replied with "B."

Alli smile and said "A 'B' is very good," I felt Clare nod her head.

I asked Darcy "What did we get?" She smiled at both Connor and I.

Darcy answered with "We got an A."

I say "No way."

Darcy replied with "Way," she turns it around and I see that we have actually gotten an A and if it wasn't for what Drew told me this morning I would be happy. Connor and Darcy high-fived each other and were very excited, Jenna and Alli did the same even though their grade was lower they were still happy about it.

Clare asked "Why aren't you happy?"

I replied with "I am, I've just got other things on my mind at the moment," feeling a pair of eyes on me, I looked around to find them and found that it was Drew's eyes.

Clare asked "Why is he looking at you really concerned?"

I answered with "Now's not the time Clare."

Clare said "But."

I replied with "I'll tell you but now is not the time."

Clare said "Okay," I gave her a small peck on her head before starting to go into deep thought about my Dad. I could see Mr Blam's lips moving but I wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying, I could feel my knee starting to tap which was a nervous habit as well as a sign I need a smoke to calm myself down. I felt Clare place a hand on my leg trying to calm it down but that didn't work, I start to feel my breath go weak and it was almost like I was struggling to breath. I saw everyone was now looking at me which wasn't helping my breathing whatsoever, I then felt someone move my body away from Clare and I saw Drew came level with my face. I tried to fight him off but he wasn't budging one bit, I could see his lips moving but I couldn't hear what he was saying and I could also see the concern in his eyes. I saw someone hand something to him before he turned back towards me and threw a glass of water at me, I could then hear Clare's voice asking if I was okay but I was focused on Drew.

He said "Adam, just breath. Follow my breathing Adam," I did as he instructed and I was soon able to breathe normally.

Drew said "That's it, in and out Adam just keep doing that," which is what I did. Drew was then given another glass of water this time though he handed it to me and told me to drink it.

Mr Blam asked "Is everything okay?"

Drew responded with "Yeah, he was just having a panic attack," I took a sip of my water.

Clare asked "How did you know what to do?"

Drew replied with "He had them all the time as kid, at home, at school and even at the shops. The only way to communicate with him is by throwing a glass of water into his face, he then is able to hear what everyone else is saying."

I then say "Can I be excused?"

Mr Blam replied with "Yeah of course," he brought me over a hall pass.

Drew asked "Are going to be okay?"

I replied with "Look thank-you for that but this doesn't mean anything, you are not my brother and you never will be," I placed the glass down and left the room to go and have a smoke.

* * *

Sitting in the cafeteria waiting for everyone else to show up, I was still on edge about my Dad being here in Canada and no smoke was helping me. After science I'd skipped every other class just to try and calm myself down but nothing was working, I wasn't surprised that I was the first one at the table for lunch. I saw Connor and Jenna enter the cafeteria but they went to go get food before coming over to the table.

 _"_ _Gracie are you awake?" "Yeah daddy," he entered the room and got into bed with me. He place his hand across my stomach as he inhaled the scent from my neck area, he then forced me to roll over onto my stomach. He then slips my pyjamas bottoms down before rolling up onto me. I felt he was hard; he always was by now I had learnt to be quiet because if I made any noise he would go harder. I felt him place himself inside of me which made him groan, he then started to pull out and slamming in hard; it happened over and over again. It didn't take him long to squirt his sperm inside of me, it never took him long it was always quick but I didn't mind that. He pulled out of me; clean himself up before cleaning me up and pulling my pyjamas bottoms back up. He kissed me on my forehead and left the room, like he did every single night for as long as I can remember._

"Hey Adam," I was snapped out of my thoughts by Jenna and Connor placing their trays down on the table.

Jenna said "Sorry we didn't mean to scare you; we thought you saw us coming over."

I replied with "No, I was out of it sorry."

Connor said "It's okay, are you okay though?"

I say "Yeah I'm fine."

Jenna asked "Are you sure, you've kind of gone pale?"

I replied with "I said I'm fine okay."

Jenna said "Okay, where Clare?"

I replied with "I don't know, I haven't seen her since science."

Connor said "There she is, walking in with Darcy and Alli," he points and I look over my shoulder to see them walking over to us. Darcy takes a seat next to Connor, Clare sit down next to me and Alli sits next to Clare.

The others all start to talk; Clare turns to me and asked "What's wrong?" I don't think it's what she was going to say but she must've seen my pale face.

I replied with "It's nothing, don't worry about it," I really didn't want to ruin Clare's day and I didn't want to make her panic.

"Something is wrong, I can see it in your eyes."

"It's nothing for you to worry about."

"You are my boyfriend Adam, so I am going to worry."

"Clare just leave it alone, please," I asked her through my eyes, now wasn't the time and I wished she could understand that.

Darcy asked "Hey is everything okay?"

Clare replied with "Clearly it's not," great I thought as everyone at the table was now looked at me.

Sighing, I say "I'm going for a smoke," I stand up from the table and leave without looking back at anyone.

* * *

Clare's P.O.V

I watched as Adam left without looking back at us or even giving me a kiss on the forehead like he normally would, the thing that sucked most about this situation was he is in pain and I don't know why or how I'm supposed to help him.

Darcy asked "What was that about?"

I replied with "I have no idea," I sighed as I tried to work out what was wrong with Adam.

Alli asked "Was he acting weird before we came in?"

Connor replied with "Yeah but his been acting weird all day since he wasn't in any of the classes we share."

Jenna then said "We scared him when we put our tray's down onto the table, he had this really off in the distance look on his face and was very pale after we scared him. Whatever he was thinking about or watching in his mind scared him."

Darcy said "That doesn't sound like Adam at all, skipping classes, snapping at you and being scared." I went over all the information in my head, Adam had a panic attack, skipped a his classes, was scared of something in his mind, smelt like smoke but not just a two smoke smell and he snapped at me for trying to get him to talk. There was only one thing that came to mind with all of this information but I didn't think it could be but it would explain the way Adam's been acting.

I got my conclusion when I looked over at Drew who had a scared look on his face, Dallas who was sitting next to him had the same scared look, Drew look at me and slowly nodded his head and that gave me my answers. Turning back to face my table I had the same scared look on my face, I was also worried about Adam and it's a no wonder he skipped his classes and had a panic attack as well; I was surprised he was still in school to be honest.

Darcy asked "What is it Clare? What's wrong?"

I replied with "I need to go find Adam," I nodded my head trying to reassure myself before I had to reassure Adam. Standing up from the table, I left without looking back because I had no time too; I just needed to go find Adam, quickly. It wasn't incredible hard to find Adam, I just had to go to his favourite smoking spot which was up on the roof. Adam and Eli had found it one day but it was Adam who brought me up here first, I remember the peaceful look he had on his face, it was like all the demons he faced couldn't get him up there.

Pushing the metal door open, I see Adam standing there looking out into the open space and I say "I worked it out."

I watched as Adam tipped his head back to look up at the sky before he said "It would be so easy to jump right now and then everyone's life would be much better."

I shout "Don't you dare Adam Torres!" I stood there in complete shock at Adam's words.

Adam turned to face me and he said "What's the point Clare? Nobody cares about me, my Mother is insane and an evil bitch-witch. My Dad is going to find me and then kill me once his done so. I have no family, the brother I got used to be my bully and now he wants to understand and be buddies. There's no point Clare," he then turned back around to look off into the distance.

I shout at him "What about me Adam? How about Jake and Darcy? or Connor, Jenna and Alli what about them Adam?"

Adam replied with "They're your friends Clare, he is your brother and she is your sister and you deserve so much better than a freak like me. Someone as messed up as me, someone with baggage, no Clare I don't deserve you."

"Adam, they are our friend they care about you just as much I do and they'd do anything for you; if you just asked. Jake and Darcy as for them, they count you as their brother, you're part of our family Adam and they want you to be a part of it. You are not a freak, yes you have baggage and it's pretty messy at the moment but that doesn't matter to me, actually it makes me love you even more. Get down from the ledge Adam, don't let your Dad control your life and take it away from you and same with your Mother too. They are horrible people but the one good thing they have done was bring you into the world, my world and I wouldn't change that for the world. You are my boyfriend Adam but you are so much more than that, you are my best friend the one person I can tell anything to without any judgement. I love you Adam, please don't do this," I had only moved a few inches closer the last thing I wanted to do was scare him off the edge. I could feel the tears running down my face as I held out my shaky hand ready for him to take. Adam slowly turned back around to face me again, he was crying as well and I sigh in relief when he reaches out and takes my hand in his. I pull him down from the ledge and into my arms; where we both start crying and holding each other. I don't even want to imagine what could have happened if he hadn't of turned around or if I had gotten here too late, my life without Adam is just no life I want to live. We both didn't have the energy to stand up crying, so we slowly faded down onto the ground where we continued to cry and hold each other.

Through tears I say "I love you Adam, I love you so damm much and my life without you isn't worth living."

Adam pulls back to look at me before he said "I'm sorry Clare, I'm so very sorry."

"It's okay Adam, it's okay," I keep repeating that it's okay and I pull him back into me; I just need to hold him even longer than I already have been.

"I just don't want you in my life Adam; I need you in my life. I need you in my life and you need to understand that," I felt Adam nodding his head against my shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Clare. I'm sorry that you had to see that, see me like that and I never wanted you to see that."

"It's good I did Adam, I need to know what's going on because then I can help, if I don't know what's going then I can't help. I need to see you like this because this is the real side of our relationship, the side no one see us, the side that it for our eyes only. Adam, seeing these sides of each other makes us real and stronger tougher."

Adam pulls back again and said into my eyes "I love you Clare, so, so much," Adam then leant forward and joined our lips together. For the rest of the school day we spent up on top of the school's roof, holding each other, taking turn holding each other, kissing, saying the magical three words and just being with each other; and in the end it's what we both needed more than anything else in the world or in this moment.


	5. Chapter 4: Part 2

When we heard a bell and then the sound of car engines we realised it was the end of the day, we picked ourselves off of the ground and made our way back down into the school. After going back to each other's locker to grab our bags as well as any work we need to complete before school tomorrow and then we head to the car where Darcy was waiting for us to all head home. The drive home had been silent the only noise to be heard was the radio which wasn't playing very loudly much too Darcy disgust. At home Darcy was the first out of the car, I looked across at Adam and I saw this really distant look in his eyes.

"Adam," I whisper not wanting to scare him with my sudden noise. Adam didn't say anything though, he turned and looked at me, and we sat there staring at each other for a while. Reaching out with a shaking hand I place it on Adam's cheek, I felt Adam lean into my hand and inhale a deep breath.

"Everything's going to be okay Adam, I don't know how or when but I do know as long as we've got each other than everything should work out." I watched as Adam took in my words before this big goofy smile came upon his face and I felt my heart swell up with joy; at one smile from Adam.

Adam then said "Love you," my face then matches his with the same smile as he had.

I replied with "I love you too," Adam smile seemed to grow before he leant forward and pecked my lips. I went to kiss him back but then he moved, I looked at him and see his now out of the car and making his way over to my side of the car. Adam opens my car door and helps me out of the car, he even takes my bag from me and we walk hand-in-hand to the front door.  
In the lounge room we saw both Darcy and Jake setting up a basketball game, Darcy said "You two took your time to come inside."

I replied with "We had somethings to do."

Darcy asked "Does it have to do with you two missing all your classes this afternoon?"

"Clare missing class, ha," Jake said throw laughter.

Darcy replied with "I know, I don't believe it either but they left during lunch weirdly and then they don't show up for classes. What's going on?"

I looked at Adam, who had this scared looked on his face and I wasn't surprised when he snapped with "It's none of your business so stay out of it," I literally see Adam's safety walls coming up as he moves away from me and over to his bag which he'd dropped.

Adam turns to me and said "I'm going for a smoke," I nod my head and watch as he leaves.

Darcy asked "What's wrong with him?"

I replied with "His just got a lot going on at the moment," I stare at the door he had just left angrily through.

Sighing, I say "I'm going upstairs to do homework, if Adam comes in looking for me would you tell him."

"Sure," they both said. I picked up my bag and Adam's bag and I head upstairs to our room with them. Up in my room, I smiled at all of Adam's things being in the room; who would've thought my parents would be cool with him and I sharing a room. Walking slowly over to the desk we shared, I sat down at it and saw a piece of paper sitting on top of the desk. Adam used this paper to either draw or write on, picking up a pen I started to write out my feelings about what happened today.

* * *

Adam's P.O.V

Taking in a long drag of smoke before slowly breathing out, as I started to cough I heard the door behind me open. I think I had already had three cigarettes and was now on my fourth and as I turned around I saw Darcy standing there. Turning back around I let more coughs out before stopping for another drag of my cigarette.

Darcy asked "Are you okay?"

"Peachy," I replied with while looking out across the street.

"What happened today that's gotten you so freak out?" I felt Darcy place her hand on my shoulder and I stepped away from her hand.

Looking at Darcy, I asked "The guy, who did what he did to you, was he ever caught? Like did you ever work out who it was?"

"No, the night it happened I was too out of it to see a face. I've tried everything to remember who it was but I never see a face, why are you asking?"

"You are lucky, you get to forget. You get to forget the monster that haunts your dream, the monsters that make you scream at night. You are lucky Darcy, some of us never forget," I looked at Darcy while speaking before moving to sit down on the step out front of my house.

"I don't get to forget Adam. Just because I don't know who did that to me, doesn't mean my monsters are gone. Sure I've dealt with it but there are still some nights I wake up screaming and crying because I feel him on top of me, you never forget what happens to you Adam. Who is your monster Adam?" Darcy had sat down next to me and when I looked at her, I saw this frighten look on her face and I knew that looked; I had seen it a few times on my own face.

Looking back out at nothing, I say "My Dad, he is my monster, my demon. It's bad enough not knowing who they are Darcy, but it's a completely different story when you are related to them. When a part of them is inside of you, it makes you question everything, Darcy. So when I say you're lucky, you are lucky." I hadn't intended on telling Darcy or anyone after Clare but Darcy just had this way, it's the bond we have; was my main guess.

"I don't know what he did to you Adam but you are not him, you are nothing like him or your Mum for that matter."

"Do you want to know where Clare found me this afternoon?"

"Okay?" Darcy said in this unusual tone of voice.

"I was standing on the edge of the school roof, I was ready to jump and if it wasn't for Clare let's just say I wouldn't be here talking to you."

"Been there," I snapped my head to look at Darcy with shock evident on my face.

"Like I said, I was very messed up after realising I was raped. Part of that was almost ending my life on the school roof but Mr Simpson, of all people talked me down off the edge."

"I had no idea," it was all I could think of saying.

"Not many people know only my family and Mr Simpson."

I asked "Why did you tell me?"

"It might not seem like it but things do slowly get better, you'll never forget what's happened to you but it doesn't have to define you and stop you from leaving your life."

"I wanted to believe that, I do but that isn't going to happen until his out of the picture all together."

"What are you talking about Adam?"

"The reason I am so messed up today is because I found out my Dad is in town and is looking for me."

"Adam, what did he do to you?"

I replied with "Unspeakable things, things no one should do to another living, breathing thing; ever."

I asked before she could say anything "Did Clare know you almost jumped?"

"Yes, our parents told her after I left."

"Then she's had two people she loves almost end their lives without even thinking about her," realising what I had said I stood up and went running inside to find Clare.

"Jake, where's Clare?" I asked/yelled at him

"In your room," I took off running upstairs to find Clare; I needed to tell her stuff and just hold her in my arms. When I walked into our shared room, I found Clare sitting at the desk writing furiously on a piece of paper and walking to stand behind her. Reading over her shoulder, I was able to read what she was writing. _  
_

 _Why does everyone I love seem to be hurting? And never chose to inform me of how they are actually feeling. First my sister Darcy, I understand I was quite young when everything happened to her but I would've helped given the chance. Then there was Eli, sure I didn't love him as much as I once thought I did but I still cared about him. He was a mess and I couldn't help him, I thought I was helping him but in the end I was just hurting him. And now Adam, I love him with every single fibber of my body, I could've lost him today. He could've jumped or slipped and I'd never see him again. He didn't stop to think about how it might affect me; I don't want to be that girlfriend that has to remind their boyfriend they are here for them no matter what. I don't want to be a clingy girlfriend but I don't want a dead boyfriend either._

I knew I shouldn't be reading this because these were Clare's private thoughts but I was glad I had because I had stuffed up in many ways today, more than I probably ever would have realised without reading this.

"I'm sorry," I whisper out as I drop down to my knees.

"Adam," I hear Clare yelp as she turns around to see me sitting there completely crushed.

Clare said "You weren't meant to ever read this Adam."

"Well I did and it is how you truly feel or else you wouldn't be writing it."

"Okay, yes this is how I feel but can you really blame me?"

"No, it's my fault. I didn't stop to think about anyone else but myself when I got up there today on the ledge, I didn't. All I could think about was how everyone would be better off without me in their life, especially when they find out what happened to me and how my father we'll probably come after everyone."

"I understand that Adam but you could've talked to me, instead of dealing with this by yourself. We are in this together," chancing a look up at Clare I didn't see anger just concern.

"I'm sorry Clare." I felt Clare wrap her arms around me and I buried my head into Clare, taking a deep breath of Clare scent just to relax myself.

"I love you Adam. I understand a lot had happened to you over the years that makes it hard for you to trust people and open up to them, but I'm never going to hurt you Adam I could never." Pulling back from being in Clare's arm, I stood up from the ground and started to look for something. I had been keeping this for a special moment, which I didn't think was going to be this soon but it was something that seemed needed for this moment. When I had found what I was looking for I sat back down in front of Clare, who was looking at me confused.

Clearing my throat, I say "I had been keeping this for something special but I thought now was better than any other time. Clare I think you are absolutely amazing, you were my friend before you even knew about my past and then when my past was revealed you stay by my side, as my friend and as my boyfriend. I love you and I know you love me, I know I can mess up sometimes like today but as long as it's not too often and we come out on top afterwards; all will be good. I want to be with you Clare, you make me smile, laugh, feel incredibly special and lucky to just know you. With that being said, Clare Edwards would you do me the proud honour of one day becoming my wife?" I had managed to get onto one knee in front of Clare while also revealing the small white box, inside the white box showed a small sparkling diamond engagement ring. When Clare hadn't said anything for two minutes, I looked at her to see shock completely evident on her face and she had her hands in front of her mouth as tears rolled down her cheek.

"Umm…we don't have to if you don't want. Shit, I'm sorry Clare I just thought that's the direction we were heading in and I couldn't wait any longer, I'm sorry."

"No Adam shut up," it was my turn to look at Clare in shock and confusion.

Clare continued with "We are heading in that direction Adam, I'm crying because I'm happy."

"Happy?" I asked completely confused.

"Yes Adam, you make me incredibly happy and of course I want to marry you Adam."

"So that's a yes?"

"Yes Adam," Clare said through a little laughter. The biggest smile came upon my face as I wrapped my arms around Clare for a massive hug; we rocked from side-to-side in happiness.

I asked "Can I put the ring on your finger?"

"What about our parents Adam?"

"I don't care what mine think, they'll be lucky if I even tell them but yours is another story. Maybe we could sit your parents down when they get home and have an adult conversation with them."

Clare said "I guess we could do that."

I replied with "So until then I'll keep the ring in the box."

"Seems safer with Darcy," I nodded my head and looked at Clare with happiness in my eyes. Clare looked up at me with a smile on her face and before I could say anything more Clare leant forward to crash our lips together.

* * *

It was an hour later when Clare and I were sitting on our bed all snuggled up together, in complete bliss. We had spent most of the hour just talking about the wedding and what we wanted, we joked about things just to make the other laugh and I was in complete joy the whole time.

"Clare, can I make a suggestion? We don't have to do it's just a thought that I've been having?"

"Of course Adam, what is it?"

"You remember that conversation we had a while back about becoming Edwards together?"

"Yeah, you don't want to be an Edwards anymore?"

"Sort of, I would love to become an Edwards. I've always wanted a name that actually means something, a name that I can represent proudly and I would love to do it with Edwards but I don't know if you are. I remember back when we were just friends and your parents were breaking up, you said Edwards never felt like you, you'd always wanted a different name one that represented you more."

"I cannot believe you remember that conversation that was like years ago."

"I remember every single conversation we have, I remember everything about you. The point is if we were to get married shouldn't we be comfortable with ourselves and with our names.

"Yeah but what name is left?"

"I was thinking we could both change our last names to Martin, he has been more of a Dad to the both of us than anyone else could ever be."

"That is a perfect idea Adam, I can't believe I didn't think about it."

"So you like it then?"

"Adam, I love it," Clare smiled back up at me and kissed me on the lips.

We were then interrupted by a knock on our door, looking up we saw Darcy standing there "Sorry to interrupted but Mum and Glen just rang saying they're ten minutes from home with pizza and wants us to set the table." Looking at Clare who nods her head at Darcy and starts to stand up, dragging me behind them. Following the girls down the stairs and into the dining room where Jake is already putting place mat's down around the table.

Darcy said "We'll get the drink," she takes the hand Clare is holding in mine and drags her into the kitchen.

Jake asked "Everything okay?"

I replied with "It's a messed up perfect. Look I'm sorry about how I was when I got home, something massive happened today and it's really messed me up."

"It's all cool, just one of those days," Jake said. I nodded my head wishing that was the case, I grabbed the plate from the cupboard and started placing them carefully down on the place mats.

I say "To make up for being a douche early, once dinner has finished I'll pay for you and Darcy to go out and grab as much ice-cream as you want and I'll even let you drive my car."

"Serious?" Jake asked with a big grin on his face. Jake absolutely loved my car but I've never let him drive it, with the fear of him crashing my car but tonight I needed him and Darcy out of the house.

"Yeah, I'm serious."

Jake jumped up and down before saying "You are the best!" he then run over to me and hugged me, which included lifting me off the ground and spinning me around.

We then hear Darcy's voice say "I don't know Clare you leave the boys to do one simple job and this how they are when you return," Jake put me back down on the ground but still had the massive smile.

Clare asked "What's going on?"

Jake answered with "After dinner Adam is shouting me and Darcy to ice-cream, as much as we want and his letting me drive his car," Clare turned to me in surprise and I just smiled at her.

"What's the occasion?" Darcy asked very curious.

I replied with "It's my apology for me being a douche earlier."

Darcy nodded and said "Nice cover, what's the real story."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Clare looked at me and I nodded my head, Clare then got this big smile on her face.

Darcy replied with "Sure you don't, why don't you guys come with us?"

Jake said "No, they can't come because then Adam won't let me drive his car," before anyone could talk we heard the front door open and we all got into gear with finishing setting the table up.

"Hey Kids," we heard Glen say as he walks in carrying three pizza boxes. I watch Glen put the boxes on the table and as soon his arms are free, they are soon filled with Clare hugging him.

Glen said completely confused "Hi Clare, I missed you too?" he pats her back not used to her hugging him. Smiling to myself I walk over to them and wrap my arm around the both of them, I knew why Clare felt the need to hug Glen and I felt the same way.

Mrs Martin walked in say "Hey Kids. Adam, Clare everything okay?" she was confused too. Kissing the back of Clare's neck, I pulled her back from Glen and that's when every sees she has been crying.

Darcy asked "Clare what's wrong?" Clare turns herself around in my arms and attaches herself to me.

I replied with "It's been a very long, emotional day and Clare's just really happy to see her family," Clare nods her head even if that isn't the real answer and when I see Darcy looked at us, I know she doesn't believe that for a second but lets it go for now.

I whisper into Clare's ear "You okay?" Clare nods her head before pulling back from my shoulder, she starts wiping her eyes but I quickly take over for her.

Clare soon turns around and said "Sorry about that."

"It's fine," Clare's Mum said as she steps forward to wrap her daughter into her arms. I'm happy for Clare to have a Mum that cares, I'd hate for Clare to have a family like mine but I can't help miss my own Mum and wish for one like it. Feeling a hand rest on my shoulder, I look back to see it's Darcy and I wonder how she knows what I am thinking.

"Glen would you like a beer?" I ask as I move away from Darcy's hand.

Glen replied with "Yes that would be great," smiling at him before heading into the kitchen to get him the beer. Looking down at the beer, I can't help but looked down at the label and I notice that it's my Dad's favourite. I feel like throwing it against the wall and as I go to do it, I hear someone enter the kitchen and look to see it's Darcy.

"Should I get the dustpan and broom now?" she asked while walking over to me to remove the bottle from my hand.

"Sorry," I say while turning away from her.

"What made you angry Adam? Was it seeing Clare and Mum being together."

"I'm happy for Clare and you for getting great parents, I am truly. But that's not what made me angry, the beer did."

"What did the beer do?" Darcy asked while looking down at the bottle.

I replied with "It's the beer my monster drank when I was a kid, it's his favourite."

"Oh," Darcy said. I heard her place the beer down onto the bench before wrapping her arms around from behind me.

As Darcy went to say something, I heard the door open again and Clare's voice asks "Everything okay in here?"

Darcy stepped away from me and replied with "I don't know, I think he needs you more than me," I heard Darcy's footsteps walk away from me and leave the kitchen.

"Adam, what's wrong?"

Turning around, I lean up against the sink and say "I wanted tonight to be perfect after what happened but then the stupid beer had to make me emotional," I wanted to scream, yell or just something to make the anger and hurt go away.

"I'm sorry Clare," I looked up at her and just wished for once I wouldn't be a mess, for one godly hour I wouldn't be a mess.

"You have nothing to apologies for Adam, after you told me everything that happened to you I knew things weren't going to be easy, I knew you have things that need to be dealt with. I know there are going to be days when you can't breathe and just feel like screaming or crying and that is what I'm here for. I'm here as a friend, as a girlfriend and as anything you need because we are in this together."

"Together," I say with a smile on the face.

Clare then said "Come on let's go eat pizza and then talk to my parents about you know what," I nodded my head and went to leave but then I remember the beer.

I asked "Can you bring the beer for Glen? I just can't."

"Sure Adam," Clare picked up the beer and we left the kitchen together.

In the dining room Darcy asked "Everything okay?" I nodded my head but she still looked at me really concern.

"Let's eat," I say while taking my seat next to Clare and starting to grab her some pizza from this box. With Clare by my side I really believed we could get through everything together, and maybe if her family knew too they would help to but I don't know if I'm ready or if they're ready to hear how messed up I truly am.

* * *

After Darcy and Jake left with my car keys and my wallet, Clare and I offered to do the dishes hoping it'd get them on our side before we tell them. Doing the dishes took longer than normal because Clare kept stopping her drying to hug me and just be all cute, which made me want to be all cute and it just took a very long to clean/dry four cups and four plates. When we walked into the dining room finished with the dishes, we found Mrs Martins and Glen sitting at the table doing nothing just waiting for us to finished; I guessed.

Clare asked "What's going on?"

Glen replied with "We figured you two wanted to talk since you didn't go with the others to get ice-cream and Adam you let Jake drive your car."

"Wow you guys are smart," I say and groan when Clare elbows me in the gut.

"Ow, was that needed," I said while looking at Clare not angry at all.

Clare asked "Do you want another?" I shook my head and took my seat down in front of Glen and Clare soon took her seat next to me, as well as in front of her Mum.

Mrs Martins asked "What did you want to talk about?"

I replied with "Something happened today that's changed mine and Clare's worlds. I found out something very unsettling to me, something very bad that ended with me on top of the school's building roof and wanting to jump."

Glen asked "What coursed such a reaction that made you want to end your life?"

"I want to tell you, I truly do but I just can't seem to form the words and that's my way of knowing I'm not ready." I replied with while looking down at the table

Glen said "It's okay Adam, we understand and thank-you for trusting us with that bit of information," I felt Glen place his hands on top of mine and in an instant I moved my hands away and put them under the table.

Clearing my throat, I continue with "There has been something I've been planning to do for a while but I wanted it to be special and this afternoon just felt like the right time. I wanted to ask you guys first but it just sort of happened; you know how things can do that."

Mrs Martin asked "What did you want to ask us Adam?"

I replied with "I had wanted to ask you both for your permission and blessing to ask Clare to marry me."

Glen said "Right, so what you're saying Adam is you asked Clare to marry you this afternoon."

"Yeah, I was planning to ask you both but this afternoon just felt right and in my heart I know it's the right decision." I reach out with my right hand put it in Clare's hand and on top of the table.

"Mum?" Clare asked speaking for the first time in this conversation.

Mrs Martin said "I appreciate your honestly both of you, it must take a lot at your age to be open and honest with parents; which shows just how mature you both truly are. Now as a Mum all I truly want is for my daughters to be happy, do I wish you were both older? Yes. Do I wish you both already had jobs, a house and all the other adult stuff? Yes. But I think you are both old enough to make this decision and if you two are both happy, then I'll accept and be honoured to call you my son-in-law Adam." I looked at Clare completely shocked and by the look on her face she wasn't expecting that reaction either, sneaking a peak at Glen he was just as shocked as us.

Clare asked "Mum are you serious?"

Mrs Martin replied with "Of course I am Clare, I see how happy Adam makes you and how much you care about each other." Clare couldn't contain her excitement any longer; she stood up from her chair and run over to her Mum to hug her.

While Clare was hugging her Mum, I say "Glen there's something we would like to ask you?" I looked at Clare, who looked at me and nodded her head.

"What is it Adam?" he asked.

"I've had a lot of name over the years but none have ever felt like me, so Clare and I were wondering when we do get married if you wouldn't mind sharing your last name with two more people?" I asked with a smile on my face hoping like hell he'd say yes.

Glen asked back "Are you guys serious?"

"Yeah, you've been more like a Dad to the both of us within five minutes of knowing us then our real ones," Clare said while moving to hug Glen.

Glen replied with "I'd feel honoured if you both took my last name," standing up in excitement I bowled him and Clare over with a massive hug.

I gave him a minute hug before moving to Mrs Martin, I stood in front of her and said "Mrs Martin, I make you this promise today, I'll love Clare forever, I'll protect her forever and I'll give her happiness forever. I would never hurt Clare; never in a million years could I think of any way to hurt her. I'm going to love her like I might lose her the very next day, I'll never take things for grant and for a fact she'll always be here for Christmas and other holidays," I said it while looking her deep in the eye.

Mrs Martin replied with "You are a sweet guy Adam, there's not many of them going around in this day and age and that's why I know you'll keep to your word. Please from now on call me Helen from now on."

"Are you sure? I'm fine with Mrs Martin."

"Yes Adam, I'm sure," she smiles up at me before standing up to hug me. Her hugging me took me for a surprise but I was happy to expect a hug from my future Mother-in-law.

Glen asked "Now do you have a ring or?"

"Of course I have a ring," I say while pulling the white box out of my pocket. Helen stepped back from hugging me and I moved to stand in front of Clare.

Clearing my throat, I say "I have many issues to overcome, I have things that need to be dealt with and I know that with you by my side I'll get through them. You have brought me so much happiness as a friend and as a girlfriend. You have given me reason to get out of bed in the morning and just get through the day. You make me smile, laugh and feel special and wanted. No one has ever given me what you have given me and that a home, someone to love and someone who loves me back. I've never known the feeling of love or being wanted in this world, you've given me that and all you did was say hi. You were friends with me before anyone else was, you were my first friend and for a while my only friend. You showed me how to be strong, how to care for other and more importantly how to love another person. You did all of this without even knowing it, you gave me a family that I've never had before. So with this ring I hold in my hand, I want to marry the girl of my dream and the woman of my future. Clare soon to be Martin, will you do me the honours of marrying me and becoming my beautiful wife," I sink down onto one knee as I hold just the ring in my hand up.

"Of course Adam, of course," Clare said as tears rolled down her face. Picking up her left ring finger, I slowly place the ring on her finger and once it's done I hear clapping from behind us.

We then hear "Told you so Jake," looking around Clare I see Jake and Darcy standing by the door. Clare pulls me up from the ground and she wraps me up into a big hug, with lots of kisses and me just feeling very loved in this moment.

Pulling back from our moment, I look at Jake and Darcy with my arm around Clare I asked "Are you two okay with it?"

I watch nervously as they looked at each other for a very long time before turning back to us, they then run towards us with big smile saying "Of course," Jake picks me up his arms and Darcy does the same to Clare; they spin us around in the air. After the spinning in the air, they hugged us before swapping to hug the other they didn't hug and started to celebrate and getting excited like it was tomorrow we were getting married.


End file.
